I Really Hate You
by ChangedMyname
Summary: AU: Ryan is released from jail after 2 years and relies on his best friend of 10 years, Kyle, for help to get him back on his feet. The only obstacles are Kyle's parents who hate him, and his younger sister Marissa, who may hate him even more. RM
1. Chapter 1

So I cannot believe I am writing a Ryan/Marissa fic this long after the show but I will always love them and I am bored so here it goes.

This is completely AU with some stuff lining up to the original story; Ryan is released from prison after 2 years for assault & battery. He relies on his best friend Kyle, whose family hates him, including his younger sister Marissa.

This fic will be M (mostly for language, maybe later for other stuff). I hope you all enjoy it

**Chapter 1**

He took a long drag of his cigarettes and smiled up at the sun, so glad to see its shining rays outside of the iron fence for once. He licked his lips, savoring the taste of his favorite brand of cigarettes, ones he had trouble finding inside prison.

"How's it feel buddy?" Kyle asked smiling at his best friend. He had just come to bust Ryan out of this place for the last time, hopefully.

Ryan looked over at his friend of 10 years; a guy who stuck by him and who finally got his case acquitted after these two years. He was a true best friend, and Ryan owed him so much for what he had done for him.

"Man, it feels like god is going down on me. If god was like, a big breasted person with big eyes and lips"

"So just a beautiful woman you mean?"

"Yeah but a godly one" Ryan laughed as he took another drag of his cigarette and hopped into Kyle's car.

"Your poetry has been greatly missed. Dude I can not believe you are here right now!" Kyle exclaimed as he reached over and squeezed and shook Ryan's shoulder as he drove.

Ryan laughed and shoved Kyle off as he lowered the window to smoke more. It felt so good to be driving. To be looking at that brick building in the rearview, and seeing it grow smaller until it disappeared. He let out a sigh of relief when he could no longer see it.

"I am so happy right now. I just, I seriously can't comprehend it. It feels surreal" Ryan flicked the ash from his cigarette out the window.

"I can't even imagine. So where to? You gotta pick up some of your stuff? You have any idea where you're staying?"

"Uh well that's kind of the thing. I still have to figure that out. I mean I was in college when this shit went down so I have no place now"

"You know I'd take you in obviously. But with me living at home, unable to find a job…And you know my parents…."

"Yeah they are twatbags," Ryan muttered.

He hated Kyle's parents for hating him. Sure he wasn't the perfect person but they were always such assholes to him. They blamed him for everything that happened to Kyle because he was "a bad influence." They have this whole idea that Kyle would have been this Boy Scout golden child if it hadn't been for Ryan Atwood moving into a foster home in Newport at 14-years-old. It was at that foster home, which he only resided in for two years, that he befriended Kyle, and then despite Ryan moving towns over at 16, the boys were best friends. They even attended college together at UCLA (Ryan on a soccer scholarship) and lived together for three and a half years, before Ryan was arrested.

Kyle sighed. He wasn't close to his parents. They were everything that he had grown to hate about the town he grew up in. A town he never really cared for and never felt like he fit in, until Ryan moved there and shared the same views about the lifestyle. His parents were newpsies as Ryan put it, and despite the fact that his parents hated one another, they stuck together for appearances and took massive amounts of "couples getaways" to "rebuild" their relationship. Although he was pretty sure the trips contained infidelity from both sides during.

"They are going away to Palm Springs next week for a couple days so you can definitely crash then. Until then though I don't really know what to do," Kyle admitted

"I'll figure something out, don't worry. Maybe I'll call Dara. She still single?" Ryan asked

"Nah, she is with this dude Bryce. He's alright I guess"

"What about Casey?"

"She moved to Colorado"

"Jamie?"

"She lives in nyc. Maybe just call all the girls you've had things with and find a place to crash," Kyle teased.

Ryan had a definite reputation with the ladies. He was a pretty popular guy wherever he went. He knew how to party, had the bad boy "I don't care" attitude that the ladies liked, and he was fun. He had quite a lot of friends before he went away, mostly from UCLA, although he was never really close with many besides Kyle. However, some of these people wanted nothing to do with him after the conviction and others had simply moved on or away.

"So who from UCLA is still in the area?"

Turned out there were only a handful of people left. Ryan frowned and looked out the window, lighting yet another cigarette. He had the best time before he was locked up. He knew a lot of people, he had a lot of ladies, he partied all the time, he had an awesome on-campus apartment between him and Kyle. And now? Now what did he have? He had a storage locker of his stuff with nowhere to put it. College was the first time he felt normal. He wasn't in foster homes anymore, or his shitty life before he was taken from his mom. He was finally a college student and didn't have to explain why he didn't have parents. At least in foster homes he had a home to go to.

"Fuck" he murmured as he rubbed his beard, gazing out the window. "I have some money that can get me a place for maybe a week or so" he then reasoned

"Well that works. Use that and then in a week my parents go to Palm Springs. Get a part time job in the meantime and get some cash"

"With assault on my record? I may have got acquitted man but that shit still needs to be expunged from my record. Still working on that small feat" he said sarcastically

"We'll figure it out, man" Kyle reassured him.

They drove to the storage unit where Ryan had held his stuff before he was taken to be incarcerated. He loaded Kyle's Range Rover with some of his suitcases of clothes and then hoped back in.

"How about you come back to my house for right now, you can shower and shit and get changed, and we will come up with a game plan"

"Your parents home now?"

"Nah just my sister home for summer break"

"Ugh" Ryan moaned. His sister Marissa and him didn't see eye to eye either. She was an annoying little brat and as a teenager became a mega bitch just like her parents. Last time he saw her she was about 15 because he left when he was 18 and never really visited once he was in UCLA. Why would he visit the Cooper household when they hated him? He lived at UCLA even during all school breaks. That was his home.

"When was the last time you saw her? When she visited our school when she was like, 15?"

"Something like that. She somehow had the bitchiness of a 20-year-old though"

"Well she is still kind of a bitch, fair warning. She goes to UCLA actually. She's in a sorority"

Ryan groaned extra loudly "Of course she has to ruin the place I call home. And a sorority girl? So she is a whore now too?"

"Hey, come on man, you loved the sorority"

"Yeah to fuck. They are horrible human beings otherwise"

"Well she's….okay. Kind of. Also kind of a bitch"

"Surprise Surprise"

They pulled up to Kyle's home and it looked the same as it always did, pristinely white and gigantic. That's why Ryan always loved having parties at Kyle's when they were young. The place is like the Great Gatsby mansion.

"God damn this place never ceases to amaze me!" Ryan yelled as he ran up with his two suitcases and hugged the column to the entry. "It's been a while old friend" he said as he kissed it, then started to comically hump it

"Dude that's enough! She's not into you" Kyle joked as he grabbed his friend's arm and opened the front door

"Set your bags at the door and you can use the shower if you want" Kyle said

"Yeah, I need a shower. It's going to be so nice to use a shower with no shower shoes and a bunch of muscley dudes eye-banging you"

"Speaking of muscles, hombre, what's the deal with the guns you are now carrying?" Kyle commented, pointing to his friend's arms "Those things certified?"

Ryan laughed, "When you have nothing to do but play cards and read, you get a lot of working out done. I'm like a greek god now" he said as he flexed

Kyle laughed, "Well you look great, and if that makes me sound gay so be it. I'm embracing it"

"Thanks dude. If homosexuality was a choice we could totally bro-out together"

Kyle pounded his chest with his fist and then held it out "Respect"

"Alright I'm gonna shower. Is the upstairs one cool to use?"

"Yeah go for it"

Ryan grabbed some clothes from his bag and rushed upstairs to shower. He turned on the water and ended up showering for about a half hour because it felt so damn good. He also used this pink razor he found to shave his face and clean up a bit. When he was stepped out and got changed he looked in the mirror. He looked a bit tired, and his hair was a bit disheveled, but he smiled at his reflection. He was 24 now, and he was out of jail. If he hadn't been acquitted he would be looking at a 29 year olds reflection instead.

He stepped out of the bathroom and bumped into someone.

"Woah what the-" he heard as he looked up. He then was met with the eyes of Marissa Cooper, and the body of a 20-year-old Marissa Cooper. You knew Marissa was going to be hot, even at 15, but jesus christ she really grew into herself nicely.

"Oh. It's you," she then said, stepping back "I thought you weren't allowed here"

And then the anger struck again. She was hot as hell, and then she opens her dumb mouth and he remembers she is the worst

"Yeah well here I am. What's up beanpole?" he asked, using the nickname he gave her when she was 10 when she was a thin little awkward stick.

She rolled her eyes "Very mature, as always"

"Yeah well we can't all be grown up and bitchy like you" he smiled

She grew angry. He was always like this. A total asshole. "How was jail? Fun?"

He furrowed his brows. God he couldn't stand her. It started with her as an annoying pre-teen, always tattling on him and Kyle, then to a straight up bitchy teen who valued what this dumb society thought. She was the epitome of Newport.

"Super fun. Heard you're in a sorority now though. Congratulations on being a slut now. Always knew you'd get there" he winked and then walked away to go downstairs

"Fuck off" he heard as he left, which made him smile.

He entered the kitchen where him and Kyle had hamburgers, which was now the best meal Ryan could ever remember. They discussed a gameplan and decided that they'd ask their friend Dara for a job. She was a bartender at the Bait Shop and could probably get him something. And he knew bartending there was awesome money. He reached out to her and she was excited to hear from him and told him to come down immediately.

Just like that, everything now didn't seem so daunting. If he got this job he could get some cash, and eventually a place. This could work. As they gathered their stuff for Kyle to bring him to the Bait Shop, Marissa came downstairs.

"You know, he can't stay here," she said, pointing to Ryan as she got a bottle of water

"Mind your own fuckin business how about that" Ryan sniped

"Seriously, Marissa. He is going to stay when here when mom and dad are in Palm Springs and I expect you to keep your mouth shut when he does"

She turned as she sipped from her water "Why should I?"

Ryan felt himself about to blow up. He clenched his fists "Cause you should"

"Why?"

Kyle saw Ryan was about to flip so he stood up "Don't fuck around Marissa. Keep your fat mouth shut"

"What do I get if I do?"

"Not being murdered" Ryan said threw clenched teeth

Kyle cut in "You can have a huge party here"

"I can have a party here regardless"

"I'll….pay for it. Within reason" Kyle sighed

She smiled, proud of her blackmail strength. "That'd work, I guess"

"Fuck off, come on!" Ryan yelled "You're gonna let this bitch blackmail you dude?"

"It's not worth arguing dude. I have a little bit of money….sort of"

"No. no. I'm not letting you pay for this….this cunt"

Marissa's mouth dropped "Excuse me?"

"You heard me. You're being a cunt. I have nowhere to stay and you are blackmailing your own fucking brother. You're a cunt"

She glared at him and opened her mouth but Kyle once again cut in knowing this was going to end very badly. "Stop stop! Look Marissa you have a party, Ryan it's cool. Let's just go to the Bait Shop and get out of here. Marissa, fucking watch it. You are being a real bitch"

Marissa huffed trying so hard not to slap Ryan. She wanted to hit that low-life piece of shit. And he needed to get out of there before he said something even worse.

"Dude how do you stand her?" Ryan asked in the car

"She isn't always like that"

"Really? Because she seems 24/7 bitch"

"She has her moments….sometimes. And I usually don't cave but it's just easier for now. We get you settled and then the bitch will pay. Big time" he said as he gripped the steering wheel

"Lemme add a little money into this….this fucking party" he groaned, so angry that Kyle had reasoned with the devil.

"No man it's cool. My parents leave us some money when they leave. I am going to use my end to pay for some and I have a little money myself. It's cool. Don't worry about it"

He hated that Kyle was doing this but he also really needed to stay at his house so he stopped arguing with him. He lit a cigarette, trying to calm himself. Marissa had grown into the person he knew she would. Even so, she seemed particularly bitchy to him about not wanting him in the house. She never wanted him there, but she seemed really against it now.

"Does she still think the whole….fight thing was on me? Like, the whole arrest and stuff?"

"Who Marissa?"

"No, Condoleezza Rice. Yes, Marissa"

"Look, I explained to everyone the real story. It's up to them whether they believe it or not, even if it is the truth"

"Fuckin people" Ryan shook his head. He feared people wouldn't believe what really happened; that they would think he was this psychotic guy who put another guy in a short-term coma, which he did do, but not because he started it. He was always judged due to his unfortunate past, and now that had only grown exponentially. He just had to hang onto the people who knew the truth.

* * *

Okay I hope you liked it. It is only going to get better, I just had to establish some stuff.


	2. Chapter 2

Hey guys! Please review!

**Chapter 2**

It was 6 days after Ryan's first day out. Things were looking better for him. He had gotten the bartending gig at the Bait Shop due to Dara and their desperation for people for the summer rush. Whatever the case, he had a job that would make him good money, and in the meantime he got paid for training. He knew that by the time next Friday would roll around, he'd at least have 350 dollars in his bank account.

Transportation was rough; he had to keep biking to work, which was a fucking hassle. Other than that, things weren't going as horribly as he had feared. However, tonight was the night of the bitch princess's party. A party his friend had to bribe his own sibling with. He felt sick that Kyle was actually doing this but he knew he vitally needed to save some money by staying at the Cooper's for 4 days. He had about 100 dollars left and the shitty motel he was staying in was 30 dollars a night. So now, he was helping Kyle get all the booze in preparation for tonight, because bitchy Mcgee (Marissa) wasn't old enough to get it herself.

"Doesn't she have a fake ID? She definitely does" Ryan said as he and Kyle lugged out the 4 kegs Kyle just bought to the car.

"Yeah but it's a shitty one. She's an idiot and got a real sketchy one that only works in real sketchy places"

"Figures" he said as he loaded Kyle's truck before then loading the load of vodka and everclear Kyle also bought.

"So, despite my complete and utter disgust with this whole deal, we are going to this thing right? Been a while since I got to enjoy a college party," Ryan asked

"Yeah, for sure. You think I'd buy this booze and not enjoy it myself? Fuck that"

Ryan smiled and they drove back to the Cooper household where Summer and Seth were over to "help Marissa decorate"

Ryan groaned when he saw the sorority and fraternity letters hanging on the wall in banners. Sure he attended the frat/sorority parties but he really hated the frat bros and only liked the sorority girls for sex purposes. However, usually once he is fucked up he doesn't care about how they are horrible people and ends up having fun.

"Oh please tell me there is no theme," Kyle said

"Toga party" Marissa said as she set down white table coverings over the tables where they'd place all the booze and cups.

"UGhhhhhhHGHHH," Ryan groaned hard and then motioned vomiting

"Oh you are just so cool aren't you? Too good for a toga party but not too good for jail," Marissa sniped

Kyle looked at Ryan "Don't bother, dude. Please"

"Wanna bring in your own kegs that you made your brother buy by blackmailing him?" Ryan asked

Marissa rolled her eyes "No. They need to go outside anyways. Kyle and Seth can move them, right guys?" She asked

"That is debatable" Seth answered "You see I pulled something the other day moving Summer's bed and I just don't know if my back is up to physical labour. My doctor says I shouldn't aggravate the nerve any further. I mean, I didn't talk to him directly but….that's what I assume he'd say"

Ryan snort laughed, "Who the fuck is this kid?" he asked amused and pointed to Seth

"That's Seth, Summer's boyfriend. You remember Summer- Marissa's best friend"

Ryan looked to Summer. Goddamn time has done all these girls really well. "Oh yeah, little Roberts" he motioned to her and she smiled meekly. "So this is the dude that bagged ya huh?" he asked and looked to Seth

Marissa glared at Ryan, expecting him to make fun of Seth and be a total dickhead just because he wasn't the coolest of people. Marissa could be a cliquey bitch when she wanted but Seth was a great guy and great for Summer

"Nice to meet ya man" Ryan went over and shook Seth's hand "Wanna help us grab the rest of the stuff if you can't do the keg?"

Seth nodded "I can do bottles. I have good finger dexterity. Good finger and hand strength"

Ryan laughed again. He liked this kid. He seemed genuine. Ryan liked genuine people. He didn't seem the type to fit into the Newpsie life, which he obviously respected. "Alright, well come on" he said as they went to the car to unload it

"So that's the dickhead? I mean I remember him being a douche when we were young but he doesn't seem….bad" Summer said after they left. Marissa had talked incessantly about how she doesn't want Ryan staying there and how much of an asshole he is. But from what Summer just saw he seemed fairly harmless. Hot and harmless. Really hot actually.

"You saw him in rare form. I'm sure he will make fun of Seth when we aren't here or something. He is usually a jerk, believe me," Marissa said.

"At least he is really nice to look at," Summer said as she pulled a table over to set up the pong station.

Marissa stuck out her tongue pretending to gag "Ugh no way. He is awful inside and out"

Summer looked up and put her hand on her hip "Oh please. You can't be so blinded by hatred that you can't appreciate his hotness. The man is hot. Like, I would do dirty things that I thought I would never do, hot"

Marissa made a grossed out face. "Uh, no. Never"

"Man, you must really hate him to be so stupid"

"Hey!" Marissa shouted but kind of laughed

The boys came in, Seth carrying his bottles, and Ryan and Kyle carrying kegs. They went and placed them in the backyard before returning to the family room.

"Hey, can you push the couch against the wall and roll up the rug? I really don't want people spilling stuff on anything," Marissa asked.

"Pretty sure Kyle agreed to pay for this, not be a manual labourer," Ryan said

"What? Do you speak for him or something?"

"You can help me move it, yes," Kyle said and Marissa sighed and got down and struggled in helping him move the couch, as Ryan smirked watching.

"Wow you are reallllllly weak" he mused

"Shut. Up" She said through clenched teeth.

It was 9pm and people were now showing up in droves looking like total douches in their "toga" attire. The dudes in particular. Ryan didn't mind the girls wrapped in sheets. Marissa didn't want them to attend, obviously, but Kyle put his food down on that one. Kyle, Ryan, and Seth, however, decided to forgo the costumes.

"I just wouldn't look good wrapped in a sheet. I'd probably come off as more confused hospital patient rather than greek god," Seth said

Ryan laughed as he poured himself a frothy beer from the keg. This Seth kid cracked him up. He was the antithesis of this party and the people in it.

"Let's get fucked up, men," he said as he handed Seth and Kyle a beer.

He turned around and saw Marissa finally come down and start greeting people and he choked on his beer a little. She looked really good. His brain really really hated her but his penis had different ideas. She had her hair in long beachy waves, had this gold eye makeup on, had those gold feather things laced in her hair, and had on this thin sheet wrapped tightly across her, exposing her bikini underneath.

He shook his head, as if to rid him of the thoughts and images that just popped entered. He then made a 'blech' face, realizing what just happened. Marissa? Gross. So gross. He then reached for the bottle of everclear near him and started to chug some, before coughing violently. He needed to just get fucked up tonight, and quick.

"Dude calm down. Everclear is nothing to be chugged," Kyle said

"I know, it's disgusting. But I need to get to the part where I like these people," he responded.

* * *

Within the hour the house was packed with about 100+ people all dressed in toga's. And Ryan was already very drunk.

"Yo the chicks here are ridiculously hot," he said as he put his arms around Seth and Kyle's necks. "Let's pick which lady I will be bedding" he smirked and looked around

"Well I'm gonna go for that one," Kyle pointed.

"And I am happily attached to that one" Seth pointed to Summer across the room

Ryan looked across the backyard, which had a bunch of people in it as well, some even in the pool. He then spotted a blonde haired beauty talking to some other girls. "See ya later, gentlemen" he said and bowed and tipped an invisible hat before going over to the girl he spotted.

The girl, whose name was Nina, was undeniably stupid, but hey she was hot. Ryan brought her over to the keg to get her a drink and knew he was close to sealing the deal with her, when he heard a voice from behind him

"Be careful Nina, he's been in jail"

He turned to see Marissa who pushed passed him to get some beer.

He glared at her furiously. He turned to Nina who looked a little off-put but was so wasted he couldn't really tell.

"It was all a huge mistake. It was appeallled" he slurred

"A-peel?" she then asked

Ryan turned to Marissa "mind your goddamn business"

"I am just helping out a friend," She said as she put her arm around Nina. "And I don't think she needs a convict"

Ryan was fuming, "not a convict. I was released remember? Because I am innocent"

"I'm pretty sure future employers will see otherwise," she then sniped. She was pretty sure she did her job, and with a smirk, she started to walk off.

"Fuckin bitch!" he yelled after her and she just flicked him off without turning around

He was so furious but knew if he totally lost his cool, his chances with Nina were gone. He turned to her and apologized and explained that he was wrongly accused, although Nina didn't seem to really care. In fact, the jail thing seemed to turn her on even more. He asked her if she wanted to go upstairs and she nodded. He smiled and they started in, but Ryan saw a golden opportunity.

"Hey, I'll meet you inside" he said and she smirked and walked off. He then walked over to where Marissa was standing, perfectly next to the pool and talking, and gently pushed her in.

"You fucking, dick! I am going to kill you! I swear to god!" she screamed as she emerged, seeing Ryan laughing at the edge.

"Can't do that. You murder me, and then you go to jail. And then it won't be as fun for you to make fun of me," he said before walking away.

He went to Nina, and they disregarded the tape going across the stairway that read "UPSTAIRS OFF LIMITS." He led her to the parent's room and they started fooling around. Sex after being in jail was like giving a kid candy after withholding it for so long. The night he got back he ended up having sex with this girl at a bar, and since then he's had a couple hookups. He felt like he was sex crazed before jail, and now it was only exacerbated.

Marissa and Summer started to her room so Summer could help her look good again after the pool fiasco.

"He's such an asshole! He is in no way staying here anymore," she said.

She then saw her parent's room closed, which she knew she left open. She hoped no one violated the no upstairs policy. She went and tried to open the door but it was locked. She huffed and then knocked on the door

"Whoever is in there, stop! Upstairs is off limits! Get the fuck out! If you aren't out in 10 minutes I'm breaking the fuck in," She threatened before going off to her room with Summer.

15 minutes later Marissa emerged in a side braid and a new sheet, just in time to see Ryan and Nina emerge from her parents room.

"You," She said through gritted teeth

Ryan looked up at her and smirked "How was the pool? Looked kind of cold"

She went into a blind fury and ran up to him, pushing him as hard as she could so he actually lost balance a little.

He laughed "Is beanpole mad?"

Nina, seeing things escalated, apologized shyly before going back downstairs.

"You ASSHOLE! You think you're so funny? You're a low life piece of shit!" She spat

Summer, tried to intervene but Marissa and Ryan snapped at her to stay out of it. She was too drunk for this shit so she went downstairs too, hoping nothing bad would happen.

"You're a low life piece of shit just wrapped in fancier packaging! You have this ridiculous complex that you are all fuckin fancy and classy but guess what? That's your parents money, babe! You are NOTHING. You will become nothing. You are a cunt with her parents bank account" he was now close to her face, glaring at each other

She was breathing heavily and then she snapped. Completely. She started to hit him everywhere with balled up fists, swinging as hard as she could. "You good for nothing piece of absolute garbage! You are the most disgusting human being I have ever encountered!" She screamed

She was going absolutely haywire on him and he finally had enough and grabbed her arms tightly, pushing her against the wall just to stop her reigning blows on him.

"Get off me!" she squirmed "What are you gonna do? Assault me? Wouldn't be the first time you did that to someone"

"SHUT UP!" he screamed in her face, they were nearly nose-to-nose. "Just shut up! I'd rather be a criminal than a horrible person like you! You make me absolutely fuckin crazy!"

They were breathing heavily, their breath actually mixing with each other's as they glared at one another. Ryan could actually smell the alcohol on her lips and her perfume mixing. She smelt the beer from his mouth with a slight hint of cigarettes. She became aware of how bright his eyes were but how dark they were at that moment. And he noticed just how big her eyes were for the first time. They stayed like that, heaving and panting as they stared at each other, for what seemed like forever but was probably only about 10 seconds.

Ryan found himself looking down at her lips and that's when he quickly dropped her arms and pulled away. What was that? What just happened there? Why was he so….drawn to her for a second? He didn't like it, and it was super confusing. He looked at her and she looked a bit taken aback as well.

What just happened? Why did she allow him to hold her like that without kicking him? Why did they just stare at each other like that? Why was his breath so enticing to her? And why did she notice his eyes? And did he look at her lips? She could have sworn he did for a second. Oh god was he going to kiss her? She shuddered. She then felt disgusted with herself with all these thoughts.

"Don't….don't ever fucking touch me again," she said, after finding her voice. She tried to sound angry, so he'd know that what he did was not okay and hopefully to deter what ever happened before.

"Don't ever fucking hit me again," He then spat back, although not as authentically as he had before. He wasn't that angry. Why wasn't he angry? She said horrible things before.

She opened her mouth to say something but ended up just walking away, wanting to get far away from him. He was left standing there; still trying to process everything that had just took place.

Once she got downstairs she stood still for a moment, running a hand through her messy braid. Did she just have a moment with Ryan Atwood? She then shuddered again and dismissed the thought. 'No way', she said to herself. 'That would be absolutely disgusting.' She then went to go drink more to forget this ever happened.

That'd work for now, at least.


	3. Chapter 3

Thanks for the reviews, keep on reviewing!

Also, I hope everyone knows I know Ryan is a douche, haha. It is very intentional. Anyways, enjoy

Chapter 3

It was about 3 a.m and the party was not at all fading down. Everyone was wasted beyond belief, the place looked a mess, some people were passed out on couches or on the floor, it reeked of alcohol, and all furnishings were sticky. Ryan was beyond gone, slurring and swaying side to side as he played pong. He missed this. He missed college parties, getting wasted and playing stupid drinking games.

Not to mention all the ladies he had scored that night. He only had sex with two, but fooled around with a couple, some of whom he didn't remember. Ever since that weird thing that happened between him and Marissa before, the whole night was a blur. He lost count of how many drinks he had consumed.

Marissa was blackout drunk. She was barely there in her head, as she stumbled around everywhere, grabbing onto the guy she had been hanging with, Trevor, for support. After that whole hallway fight with Ryan, she drank an excessive amount of alcohol. She was just so confused and disgusted with herself, and all of her thoughts from before she would rather just drown them out then deal with them. That's why she found Trevor, whom she flirted heavily with, and clung onto to keep from falling. As the music sped up, she started grinding with him, as he pinned her to him. She was so lost in the alcohol that her brain was just a vague impression of what she was experiencing.

Ryan sunk the last cup on the pong table, despite his advanced intoxication. He celebrated and told the opposing team to suck it, before promptly downing the rest of his beer. He left the pong table to get some more beer when he saw across the room, against the wall, Marissa with a guy, who was very obviously fingering her. He squinted his eyes to see if he had it right, and he definitely did. Marissa however seemed to be not very with it as she had her head on his shoulder. He looked around to see if anyone was noticing this, but everyone was so wasted and doing their own thing. He swayed back and forth, cup in hand, wondering what to do, before walking over to Kyle who he knew was near the kegs out back

"Hey bruuuh, urm your sis is kinder um" he tried to collect his words and not slur so badly. He took a deep breath "Your sis is getting finger blasted in the middle of the room by some guy"

Kyle was pretty drunk too, but quickly stopped what he was doing. "What?" he snapped

Ryan repeated himself, "Your sis is getting straight up finger in the P in the middle of the room"

Kyle shoved passed him and Ryan followed. He had to tell Kyle. That's bro code. Your younger sis is being a whore in the middle of the room? You can't let that shit go. You wouldn't want your younger sister doing anything, let alone in public.

He noticed he may have made the wrong choice when he saw Kyle go up and rip the guy off Marissa and started screaming.

"What the fuck are you doing?! You are in public!" he hissed at Marissa and then turned to the guy "Are you serious bro?! You come to my house and do that to my little sister? Huh?" he asked as he got face to face with the guy

Marissa tried grabbed Kyle's arm lazily and slurred out for him to stop

Kyle ignored her, "She is obviously wasted too. You take advantage of that?!" he screamed

"Fuck off dude, your little sis was begging for it"

Kyle's face grew red and Ryan could tell this was leading nowhere good. Normally he loved a good fight, especially when he could join. But after being released from prison for, well, fighting, he couldn't chance it.

"Okay let's all relax. We all are just washhtted" he slurred a bit as he tried to calm the two guys down.

"That isn't an excuse to assault my sister in front of everyone!"

"Assault?! Bro your sis was wet for me. She was basically panting" the guy said and panted like a dog.

That's when Kyle snapped and punched the guy in the jaw. Which was a big mistake considering Trevor was about 6'2" and beefy. The guy swung back, cracking his fist into Kyle's nose. People quickly started gathering around. Ryan went to intervene but was pulled off by 2 frat guys who were friends with Trevor.

Everyone seemed to be on Trevor's side. And Trevor was winning- a lot. Marissa was drunkenly screaming and trying to pull Trevor off. Ryan watching Kyle getting the living shit beat out of him had him go crazy, and he shoved the two holding him off and tackled Trevor to the ground to get him off Kyle. He held Trevor down by leaning all his weight across his throat to choke him out, wanting to avoid hitting because of his former arrest. He then felt himself pulled off of him by a few hands.

"What the hell dude! You choked me!" Trevor yelled as he rubbed his neck

"You could have killed my friend!" Ryan yelled, as three people held him. Ryan squirmed but was too drunk to go against three guys. Two maybe, but three was a bit much. He knew if he was one on one with Trevor, he could kill the guy. Ryan wasn't good at some things, but fighting definitely wasn't one of them.

All of a sudden people began to flee around them, including the ones holding Ryan and Trevor. Ryan looked around and saw cops in the house, clearing everyone out and Ryan froze. He felt his heart drop. Whenever Ryan encountered a cop it always ended horribly. What would happen now? Would he be in trouble for all of this? Would this somehow affect the appeal? He stood there in a panic. He looked over to Kyle who was now sitting up, wiping the blood off his face with his shirt and Marissa helping him by wiping her toga on his face.

Kyle looked to his friend and saw Ryan was scared as shit about the cops, "Dude you're fine. It's my house"

Ryan nodded. And he was right. The cops came over to Kyle and Marissa, told them they were being ticketed for noise violation and that all of these people needed to go home. They were actually kind of nice, a thing Ryan wasn't use to in cops. He still stood there nervously, wringing out his hands. After about 20 minutes, the cops had cleared everyone, having the underaged kids have their parents pick them up, and the legal ones being taken home in taxis.

The one cop also examined Kyle to make sure he was okay and didn't have a concussion or anything and asked if he wanted to press charges on the guy that did this. Kyle refused and that was it. The cops left and the house was clear.

Marissa looked at them, "I cannuuttt believe you guys" she slurred

"Us? You're the one getting finger banged in the middle of a party!" Ryan yelled

"You coulda handled it better" she said then turned to Kyle with a red face, "I'm really sorry I did that. I'm very very drunk and...that was bad I know. Really bad. But you didn't have to hit him"

"Yes I did"

"Yes he did" Ryan agreed "I mean you were being a slut but he was being a dick"

"You are one to talk"

"I am a dick, but I don't finger a nearly unconsis-unconcus" he couldn't get the word out he was too drunk, "unconscious girl in front of my frat bros and hoes"

"Just stay out of it!" she yelled, frustrated that Ryan was even speaking. "I'm sorry Kyle, for what I did. Ryan, you can go fuck yourself"

"No thanks, I had your friends do that for me"

She looked at him and looked like a bull that was about to charge, "If you don't shut up"

"You'll what?"

"Guys stop" Kyle said, holding his head "Lets just all get some sleep and you can go back to fighting in the morning when you're sober. Please"

Ryan and Marissa glared at each other before going off to bed.

"Fun party" he said as they walked up the steps

"God, shut up" Marissa responded

* * *

The rest of the time Ryan stayed at the Cooper's went fairly uneventfully, despite the fighting between Ryan and Marissa. It was clear that them sharing the same house caused a lot of tension, and Kyle started to lose his mind hearing the two constantly at each other's throats. But his parents were back now, and Ryan was back at his shitty motel, using the little amount of money he had left.

It was then Friday night, the night of Ryan's first official shift as bartender. Dara wanted to just throw him into the thick of it, seeing how he would hold up against the crowds that flooded the bar. They had extra staff on to pick up his slack when he needed it, but that was it. He had the shift from 7-11 so he wasn't at the busiest 11pm-3am shifts.

It was 10pm now and Ryan was scrambling to keep up with the demands of the customers. Thank god he was good with the ladies, because if he got the drinks wrong, or was too slow, he'd just chat them up and they'd giggle and flirt. Although, if he lingered for too long with them, Dara would come by and tell him to stop flirting and start working. This shit was a lot harder than he had anticipated, and apparently it was "unprofessional" to take swigs of the alcohol while working.

Overall, he was doing all right though. And every time he paid extra attention to the ladies, he'd get massive tips. He had just made a vodka tonic for someone when he turned to see Kyle with his friend Mike.

"Hey dudes!" he said and they did the bro hand-shake, "What can I get ya?" Ryan asked

"Two Stella drafts brotha" Mike said as he clapped Ryan's arm. "Good to see you man, sorry I haven't been able to stop by earlier. Been busy at work," he yelled over the loud music

Ryan shook his head as he poured their draft beers, "No problem man, glad you're here. I'm off in an hour and then we can get wasted and catch up"

"I'm game" he said as he took the two beers, "I don't wanna hold you up, come over to us when you're done" he said as they left the bar area.

"2 Vodka cranberry, please" he heard and turned to see this smoking hot girl. He did his signature half smile and tossed his towel over his shoulder, "Sure thing. Lime with them?" he asked

She nodded, smiling widely at him, "Yes please" she said as she checked him out, "You're new here, I'd recognize you"

He smirked as he made her drinks, "Yeah, this is my first official day. So you come here often then huh?"

She was about to answer when Marissa sidled up next to her, "Hey want me to pay you for th-"

Marissa stopped and saw who their bartender was. She rolled her eyes, "Great, I forgot you worked here. Way to ruin the best bar in this town"

Brooke turned to her, "Oh you know him?"

Ryan interjected before Marissa could respond, "She's my best friend's sis," he explained as he put the drinks on the counter

Marissa looked at Brooke, "Yeah and he's a dick," she said

Brooke opened her mouth, not knowing what to say and then looked to Ryan who was leaning against the counter

"ID ma'am?" he then asked Marissa

Marissa glared at him, "They don't usually ID me here" she said

"I do. I don't wanna get fired on my first day" he smiled at her

She clenched her jaw and fished out her fake and handed it over to him, "Fine"

He looked at the I.D. rolling it over in the light, "Yeah I don't know about this one," he said, "seems fishy. Let me just get my manager"

Marissa sighed, "Wait! Okay fine. Don't- just don't," she said

Ryan leaned against the counter with a smirk, "Or else….?"

"I thought you hated blackmail"

"Only against siblings. Against you it's fine"

"God I really hate you" she said and looked to Brooke who looked uncomfortable, then back to Ryan, "I don't know what to tell you. What….what is a reasonable suggestion in exchange for you just shutting up about this I.D. thing and giving us drinks?" she asked, not believing she was bartering with satan

He smirked as he flicked her fake id through his fingers and looked up, thinking of what he could ask of her. He knew it had to be something immediate, because if it weren't just for a tonight thing, she would take it back tomorrow after she didn't need drinks anymore.

"Okay I got it," he smirked, "You gotta talk me up to ladies tonight, like we like each other so I can get some action" he said

"Uck, no! I would never even set someone I hate up with you. That is just too cruel" she said

He sighed, "Ohhh Dara, there is this girl here" he started to say, holding the I.D.

"Fine! Fine!" she agreed and snatched the I.D. from his hands before putting it back in her clutch. "Free drinks and I'll do it"

"Deal"

Ryan smirked and then looked at Brooke, "I am guessing our chances are bit tarnished, huh?"

She nodded, took her drink, and walked off with Marissa.

It was 11pm and Ryan was clocking out. He was so psyched to see how much he got in tips tonight, along with his paycheck. Dara walked over to him, check in hand, and told him his electronic tips from cards show up in next week's paycheck but that he made 150 in cash tonight from tips.

With his check he had 450 dollars right now. 450 dollars. He felt like a rich king! He felt like kissing Dara so hard, but he resisted. He raced over to Kyle and Mike who were now a bit tipsy and told them the news!

"That's awesome, dude! Time to celebrate. Catch up with us!" they said and Ryan went to the bar and got some glasses of whiskey to down quickly.

"So Marissa is here and she gave me her fake I.D.," he told them

"Oh yeah? How'd that work out?" Kyle asked

"I blackmailed her into talking me up to other girls in exchange for me not busting her," He smiled proudly before downing his first glass of whiskey

Kyle laughed, thoroughly enjoying this scenario, "That's awesome. Having girls talk you up is just so much more successful when us guys do it"

"That's cause we are pigs," Ryan reasoned before taking a large swig of his second whiskey, "Lets get drunk and then have some fun with this" he said

They all chatted for about a half hour, Mike and Ryan catching up, but then Ryan was itching to meet a girl. He was already drunk after downing 4 whiskeys after working for 4 hours straight and not having much in his stomach.

"Okay, now where is that lil' bitch who is my minion for the night?" he asked, craning his neck to look for Marissa

"Ah, there she is. On the catwalk up there" he pointed and then downed his fifth cup.

"Bring her down here so we can see this shit in action," Mike insisted

Ryan laughed and agreed, "Alright boys, I'm gonna go get my bitch for the night, be right back" he said before climbing the steps of the catwalk to go to Marissa, who was chatting with Brooke and this other girl.

"Ah, there she is" he said, walking up behind her, "ready my slave?"

She cringed and had to bite her lip, wanting so badly to just say fuck it, she can't do this, and bail. But she wanted to get drunk tonight, and free drinks were great. She looked over to him and rolled her eyes

"Whose the helpless victim?" she asked, before downing her drink. She had to be drunk to do this

"Well come with me downstairs and we will pick" he said

She whined, "I want to be up here"

"Too bad. Brooke can come too" he smiled at Brooke, who now seemed disgusted with him, despite his good looks

Brooke said she was good and that she'd hang with her friend up there.

Marissa rolled her eyes and followed Ryan downstairs to the standing table that Mike and Kyle were at

"Hey sis," Kyle smirked as he held his drink to his lips

"Shut up. I'm sure he told you his disgusting little blackmail by now. Okay so who is it? How do I do this to get it over with?" she asked

He scratched his stubble and looked around the room and saw a girl with supermodel good looks, "Her" he pointed, and "She's the one"

Marissa looked, "She is so out of your league"

"Not with you she ain't" he said and slapped her back, to which she turned and punched his shoulder

"So I'll go over there, try and bait her back here, and you talk me up big time. Agreed?" he said

She was clenching her jaw so hard now she thought her teeth would break, "Agreed" She said murmured

"Good" he said and then went over to offer this hot girl a drink and lure her back to the table, where Marissa would hopefully work her magic. Truth was he knew he could get a girl without her, but it's easier with a girl wingman. So much easier.

"So Marissa, how old are you now? Haven't seen you in a while," Mike said. He had to admit, Marissa Cooper looked really good. He was trying not to be too forward with Kyle there, but god damn.

"20" she replied, dreading when Ryan would bring this slut back, "Your Mike right?" she asked. Mike was pretty cute, and older guys were always hot and she was kind of tipsy. May as well flirt during this hellish nightmare that is being Ryan Atwood's talker upper.

"Yeah, Mike Burns. Went to UCLA too with your brother and Ryan. You're there now I here? How's it treatin ya?" he asked

They kept talking until they then heard Ryan's voice, "Hey guys, this is Natasha" he said and mouthed behind her back to his boys, "How hot?"

"Hi" she smiled, and the boys couldn't help but stare. Natasha was ridiculously good looking. She had to model.

"Nice to meet you"

"Hey Natasha"

The boys scrambled to say hi, almost drooling at this girl.

"Natasha is a model for underwear. A model for underwear" Ryan said, sounding like a giddy kid

"Lovely" Marissa said, grabbing her brother's drink and downing it as he yelled, 'hey!'

"So Natasha, Ryan is a great guy, really really great" she said and then went to walk away before Ryan grabbed her arm and gave her a death glare. She sighed and stood back at the table

"Okay…." She said, sounding confused

"Marissa is my….ex" Ryan said, trying to explain Marissa's suddenly weird behavior. It was a reach

Marissa coughed and had to hold from gagging.

"Oh really? And you two hang out?" Natasha asked

Marissa tried not to glare at Ryan but put on her best façade, "Yes, it was a while back, we have moved on"

"We were high school sweethearts, right?" Ryan asked

Marissa bit her tongue, trying not to either yell or laugh at that idea. "Yupp. Ryan was my….high school sweetheart"

Kyle and Mike were trying to not laugh by drinking and covering their mouths.

"Aw that is so cute! I bet you were a cute in high school," Natasha said to Ryan

Ryan smiled, "Aw, you'd have to ask Marissa that. But yeah, I was pretty cute" he said which made her laugh. Score.

Marissa knew the quicker she made this girl want Ryan, the quicker she was done and could enjoy her night, "Ryan was um, such a good boyfriend. Really sweet and not at all horrible"

Ryan looked at her like, 'come on'.

"He seems sweet. What was the one bad thing about him?" Natasha asked with a laugh

"Oh this could be dangerous" Ryan said, not wanting to give Marissa any ammo on what was terrible about him

Marissa tried to gather something that would reveal her hatred for this man. "Um…" she said. 'just get this over with' she told herself. "He's got a big dick"

The boys both spit out there drink and started coughing, and Ryan stood there shocked.

"Woahhhh talk about real talk" Natasha said, "And how is that a bad thing?"

"Sometimes it was a lot to handle. It is great, but sometimes it was a lot, ya know?"

Natasha turned to Ryan in disbelief, and Ryan who was still in shock, put on a smile and shrugged "Can't blame what god gave me"

It was almost true too. He was definitely well endowed. Not to the extent of it being a bad thing though. But he definitely respected Marissa's approach.

"Well, if that's the only bad thing about you, you must be a really great guy" Natasha laughed

"I really am" he nodded

Mike had to laugh so hard he had to get another drink. "I um, gotta get another beer. Marissa want to come?" he asked and Marissa nodded, wanting to be done with this

By the time Mike and Marissa got back, they were giggling a lot together as they set their drinks down. They seemed to definitely be hitting it off. Ryan and Natasha on the other hand were nowhere to be seen.

"Where's Ryan?" Mike asked Kyle who was there alone

"Pretty sure him and Natasha are fucking in her car"

"What" Marissa exclaimed, "We were gone for 10 minutes!"

Kyle nodded, "Yeah, that dick comment really worked some magic"

Marissa stuck out her tongue disgusted, "What a slut!"

Mike laughed and had to agree, "Yeah that isn't too hard to deny"

Kyle, "By the way, I never want to hear you say dick in that context again. It's been banned"

Marissa rolled her eyes, "Stop babying me"

"She is 20, bro" Mike shrugged

Kyle glared a little at Mike, not liking his obvious flirtation with his little sister, "Yeah, but she's still my little sister"

He sighed, not knowing how he'd get Marissa with Kyle doing his whole overprotective brother thing.

Marissa hated her brother being overprotective so she downed her drink and turned to Mike, "Want to dance?" She asked

Mike looked at her, then to Kyle, "I'll be respectful" he said and Kyle glared as Mike took Marissa's hand as she led him to the dance floor, out of Kyle's sight.

Ryan came back 15 minutes later, a bit sweatier, his hair a bit messier, and his shirt a little more wrinkled. He got another whiskey and found Kyle, now alone at the table, "Where is everyone?"

"How was Natasha?"

"Lame when it comes to fucking. She just lay there and wants you to do everything. I mean, I came and she came, but talk about dead fucking fish"

"Bummer"

"So where Mike?"

"Don't talk to me about that"

Ryan looked confused at him and Kyle went on

"He and Marissa are dancing together"

Ryan's eyes widened, "He's dancing with Marissa?"

"Yeah. The two been flirting. I'm trying not to be overprotective brother but Mike is so not the dude I would want with my sister. I love him, but you know what he's like"

Ryan nodded, "Yeah. He's like me. But a nicer version"

"I'm just pissed at him. That's against brother code. If he fucks my sister I swear I'll break his dick off"

Ryan didn't like the idea of Mike with Marissa. He didn't quite know why but it kind of pissed him off. Maybe it was on behalf of Kyle, because bro-code was broken. But he felt this weird anger deep within him that he didn't understand. He felt himself gripping his glass and looking towards the dance floor, trying to spot them.

"Want me to stop them?"

"I don't want to come off as weirdly overprotective"

"Dude it's Mike. He shouldn't do that shit. I'm sure his intentions aren't great either"

"If you go over there it's obvious I sent you"

"I won't make it obvious, I swear" Ryan said, wanting so badly to stop them. Why did he want to stop this so much? For Kyle, right? Yeah, for Kyle. But he definitely knew he needed to stop it.

He didn't even wait to hear Kyle's response before he downed his drink and started to the dance floor in search of the two. He hated dancing so much, and feeling the heat off of all these people was disgusting. He stood on his tiptoes, and pushed passed people. He finally spotted them and stopped to see them grinding up on each other, Mike's hands all over her ass and their crotches all rubbing against each other, as Marissa had her head back. He felt like tackling Mike. What the fuck was he doing?

He quickly marched up to them and took Mike by the collar and ripped him off Marissa

"Yo what the fuck bro?!"

"What are you doing?" Marissa screeched

"Go back to the table Mike, now" Ryan demanded

"Dude, what is your-"

"Go back now! You are so lucky Kyle didn't fuckin see what I just did!"

Mike saw how angry Ryan was, and knew what Ryan was capable of, so he exited the dance floor drunkenly

"What are you doing?" Marissa yelled, "Did Kyle send you out here?"

"No! But I know he's upset! That's his friend, that is fucked up what Mike did!"

"We are adults! We can make our own decisions!"

"So it's okay for Kyle to fuck one of your friends!"

"If he likes her, whatever!" she yelled, even though yes, that would bother her

"Mike doesn't like you! He is a fuckin pig! I love the guy but that's just who he is"

"Why are you doing this? Leave me alone! Why the fuck do you care!" she screamed

"I don't! But Kyle-"

"Fuck Kyle! He is a big boy he can handle his own shit! You had no right to tear Mike off like that!"

"I sure as fuck did! Just like I had the right to tear that dude off you at the party!"

"Kyle did that!" she yelled but then her eyes widened "Oh my god you told him didn't you?!" she screamed and shoved him

"So you would rather I just let you get fingered in public" he asked, yelling back

"For fucks sake shut up!" she said. "Yes, that needed to stop, but why is it always you pulling these guys off me!" She screamed

"Cause you're being a slut!"

"I was not just now being one! What is the real reason?" she was drunk now, and thank god it was loud because she was screaming very loudly. "What do you wanna fuck me or something?" she spat

Ryan stood there stunned. He for once was at a loss for words with her. "Wha-are you fucking- are you serious?"

She crossed her arms, "You heard me"

He scoffed and looked around, not sure what to do in this situation. He wanted to scream at her but he was so taken aback by all this, with her forwardness.

"Oh my god you do! You want to fuck me! EW! Ryan Atwood wants to fuck-!" she stopped as he stepped forward and smashed his lips into her lips to shut her up. He was really drunk at this point and had acted so quickly in the moment he hadn't had time to process what he was even doing.

She stood there, cemented in place. What was happening right now? Ryan Atwood's lips were smashed against hers. As soon as she had time to realize what was happening she pushed him off and found her hand connecting against his face, slapping him.

He stood there, looking at her with dark eyes, and a hungry look, and she hated herself for what happened next.

She took him by the front of his shirt and pulled her to him, connecting her lips with his again. She was also too drunk to really think this through. But she did know that his lips had this enticing roughness to them and she felt herself reacting instantaneously.

He tasted her lips and they were so fuckin sweet and soft he quickly shoved passed them to taste her and he nearly groaned when he did. The kiss was ridiculously heated, and they began to grab at each other's face as their tongues fought each other. It looked as if they were hungry for each other as they made out in the middle of the floor.

Marissa felt a whimper escape her, not ever having a kiss so intense in her life, feeling him wrap his arm around her back so he could pull her into him and grab onto her. She felt her anger with him all in this kiss, almost like a weird duel between the two. She clutched onto the front of his shirt so it was balled into her fist.

All of a sudden they were whipped back into reality when they heard the DJ speak and the music turn off and the lights get brighter. They were suddenly very aware of what was happening and they pulled back, now panting for breath.

They stared at each other, wide eyed and confused.

"What just-"

"I don't know"

"Oh my god" Marissa covered her mouth, not believing what just happened, "Oh my god, oh my god. I gotta go. Now. I gotta go now" she said and quickly exited the dance floor, as the lights dimmed again and the music went back on

Ryan stayed there, standing still trying to grasp what just happened. He just made out with Marissa Cooper. And it was amazing. What the fuck was that about?


	4. I'm fucked

Okay so the rated M bit kicks in with this chapter. Keep reviewing! I have a couple more chapters in me

**Chapter 4**

"Where you been dude?" Kyle asked as he saw Ryan coming back to the table, looking a bit lost

Ryan looked at his friend and then thought about what he just did. He was still astounded about what just took place. He was trying so hard to process it, all through the thick veil of alcohol. He just made out with the enemy. And the enemy happened to be his best friends little sister.

"Yeah man, I mean I now realize what I did was a dick move. That was fucked up. You don't go after friend's sisters. That is so against bro-code," Mark said

Ryan snapped out of his thoughts and then looked at Mike, his words hitting him. Fuck, what did he just do? Not only did he make out with the girl he loathed, that was totally against bro-code. Kyle would hate him if he ever found out, and he wouldn't blame him. And yet, all he could think about was pinning his little sister against a wall right now.

* * *

She walked in a daze back to her friends up on the catwalk. They were talking to a couple of guys and turned to see their friend, "Hey, finally! It's been like, an hour!"

She snapped her head up, "Huh?"

"I said it's been an hour," Brooke exclaimed, "How'd the whole 'help out ultra douche' go?"

Marissa couldn't really comprehend anything going on right now. Her head was just a mixture between vodka cranberry haziness and confusion between what just took place. She wanted to gag. She wanted to go make herself throw up, wash herself in the shower, or just run. She had no clue why what happened, just happened.

She then realized she didn't answer the question, "Oh, um, it went okay. He banged some model slut" she answered and then took the drink her friend Fiona had and chugged it.

"Woah Coop, was it that bad?" she laughed

"Um, yeah. It was rough," she said, not looking her in the eye and running her hand through her hair, a clear sign she was uncomfortable.

"Hey," Brooke said, taking a step towards her, "You okay?"

Fiona looked at her, "Yeah you look kinda pale"

Marissa was looking down and took a big deep breathe, trying to ground herself a bit, suddenly dizzy from all the drinks, "Yeah" she laughed. "Yeah I am fine. Just need another drink," She mumbled

"Well…maybe these guys can get it for us," Fiona said and motioned to the three guys they were talking to. "This is Marissa who we were telling you about. Told you she was gorgeous"

"She definitely is. Hey, I'm Ash,"

This Ash guy was tall, dark and handsome, and was sporting a polo shirt along with his nicely quaffed hair. He looked like a damned Abercrombie model.

"Marissa" She smiled nervously. "Vodka cranberry?" she then asked him, needing a fucking drink in her hand now.

He laughed a little, "Of course" he smirked and went to go get the drinks.

Marissa forced a smile and then clung onto the railing of the catwalk.

"You sure you're okay?" Fiona asked

"Mhmm," Marissa forced another smile and nodded

She felt so sick with herself. Sick with her to allow what had happened before, and even more sick that she liked it. God, what was wrong with her?

* * *

Ryan downed two more whiskeys in mere minutes. He was now pretty obliterated. "Fuckkkkkkkk" he groaned and wobbled before letting his head rest on the table. He just wanted his conflicted thoughts gone, and whiskey always helped.

"I got to piss," Kyle said before hopping off the stool, stumbling a bit because he had drank a bit too much as well

Ryan nodded, lifted his head off the table but supporting his head with his hand.

After Kyle was gone for a couple seconds Mike spoke up

"Hey, I wanted to thank you for before. I mean, I was so pissed for you being a major cockblock at first, but dude thank god you did. Cause Kyle would have been pissed. And I definitely wouldn't have been able to resist Marissa Cooper"

With every word Ryan's stomach sunk more. He felt the guilt rising up in him, making him physically ill.

"I mean between us two, can we talk about how smoking hot she has got? Damn dude, she is so fucking" he shook his head "Ughhh so hot. It's unfair that she has to be related. So unfair"

"Yeah she's okay," Ryan lied. Obviously she was hot. She was insanely hot. She was next level ridiculously hot. And he hated her. He hated her and the fact that she was so good looking on top of it all made him hate her more. Why couldn't she be gross? Then this would never be a problem.

"Pfft you're trippin' man. You're just saying that cause you hate her"

"I gotta go out for a cigarette," Ryan said, standing up. He needed a cigarette now more than ever and he needed the fresh air along with it.

He pushed passed everyone to get to the entrance and walked outside and quickly lit a cigarette. He inhaled deeply and breathed a sigh of relief, feeling the smoke fill his lungs. He leaned against the building and closed his eyes. He felt the floor moving, the alcohol making him feel like he was at sea. Then, without wanting it, images of Marissa appeared in his head. And in those pictures he was fucking her.

He opened his eyes quickly and pinched the bridge of his nose, as if to clear his thoughts. He then took another long drag and shook his head

"This is bad" he said to himself as he exhaled, "So fucking bad"

* * *

Ash wasn't taking her mind off much. His personality wasn't very complex, and she just found herself thinking about before, over and over. His rough lips, his rough hands, and his enticing smell. And then she hated herself for thinking these thoughts. It was a vicious cycle. And the alcohol only made the thoughts worse, and dirtier. It was as if her brain was working against her, and she couldn't escape it. She just wanted to run.

"Ya know, I am not feeling that well, I am uh, going to go," Marissa said, running her hand through her hair

"Aw you sure sweetie? I mean you do look off," Fiona said, rubbing Marissa's arm

"Um, before you leave can I get your number maybe?" Ash asked

Marissa didn't even have time to make up an excuse, and she spouted out her numbers to him just so she could get out of there.

"Let me walk you to a cab," Brooke said

"It's fine, I got it" Marissa said as she then stumbled into the railing. 7 vodka drinks took its toll.

"No, I am" Brooke insisted and took Marissa's arm and led her down the steps

At the same time Brooke was leading Marissa out, Ryan and the boys decided their night was up as well.

Brooke spotted the boys as she exited the club, "Hey, boys!" she yelled

The boys turned and Ryan and Marissa's eyes locked immediately, before they both then looked down.

"Can you make sure Marissa gets home alright?" she asked

Marissa could have hit Brooke, but that would have looked weird. Should she just run? Should she just hop in the nearest cab and scream for him to drive?

"Of course! Come on sis!" Kyle said and went to take Marissa's arm, "Had one too many, eh?"

Ryan stood at the door of the cab they hailed and swallowed thickly. He wasn't expecting to see her so soon after their thing. He was hoping to avoid her for a couple days or so, so he had time to process this shit. Now they were going to share a cab, not even an hour later

They piled into the cab, and Ryan was sure to sit up front next to the driver so as not to have to sit near Marissa or look at her.

Kyle told the driver his address and then Ryan told him his.

"No, No no man stay at our place"

"What?" Ryan and Marissa asked simultaneously

"Relax" Kyle said to Marissa, then looked up front to Ryan, "My parents are sleeping. Just come in, pass out on my floor, and they won't know shit. Then tomorrow when they are out, I'll drive you home, no problem"

"No!" Marissa protested

Normally Ryan would yell at her to shut her fucking mouth but he knew this probably wasn't the best idea,

"Yeah man, I donno. If you're parents knew…."

"They won't. My mom takes massive amounts of sleeping pills at night and my dad sleeps in the poolhouse half the time"

"He shouldn't though. He really can't" Marissa insisted

"Marissa jesus, can you just be cool for once? Just once?" Kyle asked "Ryan you're staying. It's also just easier that way"

"HE CAN'T!" Marissa screeched drunkenly

"JESUS MARISSA SHUT UP!" Kyle was now yelling, surprised Ryan hadn't already. The driver looked highly uncomfortable as did Mike who was pinned against the window, wishing this would stop.

"IT'S-IT'S NOT OKAY! HE IS, HE IS A PIECE OF SHIT!"

"Hey!" Ryan finally now stepped in, "I'm fuckin sleeping at your house you prima donna fuck!" he yelled, now wanting to sleep there just to spite her.

"No!"

"If you guys don't stop shouting I am kicking you out!" The driver now threatened

Kyle then death glared at Marissa, and she huffed and crossed her arms.

During the awkward silence, Mike spoke up, "Oh Marissa, sorry about before too. It isn't gonna happen between us. Ya know, bro code and all"

"Kill me now" she said to herself as she put her head against the window.

She stared out the window, not knowing what to do. She didn't want Ryan in the same quarters as her. This was too much too soon. She barely had time to process anything and now he was like, sleeping two doors down from her?

They arrived at their house and they all stumbled out of the cab, everyone throwing money at the cabbie, being too drunk to actually count it out.

"Everyone don't be too loud" Kyle whispered super loudly

"I donno what you ever mean" Ryan slurred as he trudged to the entryway, and Marissa stumbled causing Kyle to have to hold her arm.

They entered the house, and Kyle locked the door,

"Okay now everyone shut the fuck up," Kyle whispered again as he led them upstairs

"You're the one talking numb nuts," Ryan whispered which caused Mike to snort laugh, and then Ryan hit him to shut up

Marissa got to her room, and didn't dare look back at any of them as she went in and closed her door, flopping onto the bed.

Kyle led the guys to his room and threw down some blankets on the floor for Ryan and told Mike to crash on the couch in his room.

Within minutes Kyle and Mike were passed out. Ryan however, was still up, his thoughts racing. He ran his hand over his stubble. He looked across the room at the door, and the fact that Marissa was only doors away made him nuts. God all he kept picturing was just saying fuck it and going there and screwing her brains out. But then he thought about who she was and what she was and he stopped.

Whatever the case, he needed a drink of water. He knew he'd be dehydrated come morning and needed to chug some water before he fell asleep. He stumbled as quietly as possible to the door, opening it softly, and tiptoeing down the steps to the kitchen.

He stopped in his tracks when he saw Marissa at the refrigerator, downing some water. And she was in a nightie. Was he dreaming? Had he actually passed out upstairs too and this was going to turn into some kind of sex dream?

Marissa turned and saw him, "Fuck" she muttered

Nope, this was definitely real. He clenched his jaw and walked into the kitchen, walking passed her to get a bottle of water himself.

"Just here for water" he explained, as he twisted the cap off

She leaned against the counter and looked at him without saying anything. He gulped some water and they stood in silence.

She finally spoke, "So what happened before, that was a mistake. Like a disgusting, revolting weird mistake" she slurred a little before then drinking more water.

Ryan tried not to roll his eyes. She wouldn't have kissed back like she did if she meant that but he knew she was just in denial. "Agreed" he then said, to piss her off

She snapped her eyes to him, "Pshh yeah right. You wanted to fuck me. Hense why you kissed me"

"You kissed me back"

"I was drunk. I am drunk"

"I was too"

"Okay so then we were both just drunk," Marissa said

"Yupp"

They stood in silence again.

"I still find you loathsome. I still hate you. That hasn't changed," Marissa then spat

"Oh same to you, believe me" Ryan said, and definitely meant it. He really did hate her still. Hating and wanting to fuck though are separate from one another

"Good. Cause I seriously am trying to rack my brain trying to think of anything redeeming about you and I come up at a loss," she sniped

He scoffed, now just getting angry.

"Jesus Christ can you ever not be a bitch? Do you have some sort of fuckin mental disorder? Do you have any fuckin excuse for the way you act other than you being a spoonfed little shit" he spat as he got closer to her

"I am a bitch because people like you exist. You are literal scum. I wouldn't want to ever be associated with someone like you because you don't deserve to stand next to someone like me"

He laughed sarcastically, "Just when I thought you couldn't get any worse you pour that narcissistic bullshit out. You typical piece of Newpsie shit" he said through clenched teeth, finding himself suddenly very close to he

She leaned closer in, glaring at him, "At least I am not Chino trash," she whispered and they were now in a death glare with one another, their gaze so strong it could probably burn something.

He then smelled her breathe and remembered just how her mouth taste. His heart was racing due to his anger.

She smelled the whiskey and cigarettes again on his breathe and bit her lower lip, hating herself for feeling drawn to him. His eyes had grown dark again and she was now breathing heavily. Before giving in despite everything telling her not to, they heard a door open upstairs.

Their gaze immediately broke and Ryan jumped back. They looked at each other, waiting to hear where the footsteps went, and breathed a sigh of relief after they heard them enter the bathroom, which meant it had to be either Keith or Mike. They looked back to each other, realizing what would have happened if it weren't for that interruption. Her cheeks grew red with realization and she looked away.

"I'm going to bed," she said, grabbing her water bottle. "Don't follow me"

Ryan looked at her annoyed, "Well I have to go upstairs too, so"

"Okay well….stay back. Like far" she said and looked at him oddly before rushing passed him to go to her room to pass out, and forget this whole night ever happened, and her disgusting attraction to that sandy-blonde scumbag.

He rolled his eyes and then slowly followed behind, back to Kyle's room. Thankfully the alcohol took over quickly once he lay down, because otherwise he knew his mind would replay the moment downstairs.

* * *

The next day, Ryan wanted to get out of the Cooper household as quickly as possible. With awakening, the night's events flooded back to him and all the confusion that came along with it. What happened? Why did that happen? He then felt his pants tighten remembering the intensity of the kiss and the other intense moment in the kitchen. He needed to get the fuck out of this house because all he wanted to do was go fuck Marissa Cooper.

After Kyle woke up and scanned the house for a sign of his parents, he stealthily snuck Ryan out of the house to drive him back to the motel. Once Ryan was out of that house he breathed a sigh of relief. Knowing he wasn't within 15 feet of Marissa Cooper was a relief. He ran his hand over his scruff in the car and stared out the window. He felt so guilty sitting next to his best friend, who had done so much for him, and thinking about taking his sister from behind. That was fucked up. Especially since he also simultaneously still had a lingering loathing for this girl.

And when did this start? Obviously he knew Marissa was hot, it was undeniable, but he always thought her horrible personality trumped that. Apparently, it didn't. And the whole hatred and heated anger he felt towards her was now translating into some sexual intensity. It was so much easier just hating her without this attraction shit involved.

Kyle reached the motel and Ryan thanked his friend before hoping out and entering his gloomy room. He needed a cold shower, hopefully to rid himself of all these horribly dirty thoughts; thoughts that made him disappointed in himself. He entered the cold shower and jumped a bit at the sensation. As he stood under the stream of cold water, he closed his eyes, and without wanting to, he pictured her; the feeling of her lips, the taste of her tongue, her hands grasping his shirt, her hips touching his. With a touch of self-loathing he reached down and grasped himself, clenching his jaw as he pictured more of her.

As he exited the shower he towel-dried himself and then looked in the mirror.

"I'm fucked," he muttered to himself

* * *

Marissa woke up at noon and had the same experience; the flashbacks to the night before, and all the feelings that went along with it. Then the hatred towards herself kicked in. What was she doing? Why did she do that? Sure, she had made some horrible choices when drunk (like being fingered in public), but this was an all-time low. Ryan Atwood. She made out with Ryan fucking Atwood- the man whom she had vivid images of choking out.

She then remembered his smell; it was such a manly smell. She was used to the overwhelmingly sweet scents of Hollister and Abercrombie from the guys she had been with. Ryan, however, smelled of whiskey, cigarettes, soap, and musk all whirled together to be somehow enticing. He then had those somewhat rough lips, which she hated to admit, but he knew how to use the hell out of them.

She then tried to switch her mind back to her hatred. The things he said to her last night played in her head and she felt herself getting angry again, which was good. She would rather hate him solely. He was such a horrible person, a person who went to jail nonetheless. Unfortunately, she then remembered the end of the fight, where they stared at each other and he got that look in his eye again. The look he gave her before he kissed her, and the look he gave her in the hallway the night of the party.

She was brought back to his eyes, and his smell, and his lips, and she felt her hand slipped under the covers and pushing aside her panties. She bit her lip, trying not to make noise as she touched herself with images of her nemesis.

Afterwards she was breathing heavily against the pillows, and pushed her hair out of her face.

"I am so fucked," she muttered


	5. What have I done?

Okay so this chapter is rated M, aside from language. Very M. So review!

* * *

The next few days consisted of various distractions. Ryan joined this soccer club that one of the other bartenders was a part of, and Marissa called up that boy Ash that she met briefly at the club the night of the infamous kiss. Every time either of them even thought about the other one they would quickly push it out of their minds and put their energy into other things.

For Ryan it was specifically hard, no pun intended. He found himself fantasizing about her every now and then, and sometimes distracting himself wasn't an option. He hated himself and how his body reacted to the thought of her. He hated her more for what she was doing to him, invading his mind when it was so terribly unwanted. Sometimes when he thought of her, he would think of all the horrible things she has said or done and it would help his feelings of arousal turn into his usual hatred. But sometimes it backfires and the anger turns back into wanting to slam her into a wall and then proceeding to fuck her. Whatever the case was, he needed to really get a fucking grip. He was becoming so angry with himself for being so weak. He should be able to control his dick and mind a bit better than he has been.

He requested more hours at work so he could immerse himself. Between that and his soccer, he'd get over this stupid lusting after his arch-nemesis. Also if he could find a fuckable girl in the meantime, that would really help matters.

Marissa wasn't as bad as Ryan, but she would have the occasional image pop into her head of Ryan. Images that were completely unwarranted. Marissa was, however, able to control her body better than him. To do this, she did the only plausible thing, which was just putting all her energy into another guy. A guy who didn't make her want to tear her hair out; a guy who she didn't plan on murdering. Ash was typical, and for now that was warmly welcome. He was a preppy guy of average intelligence, with little humor, but a great body and hair. He was like most of the frat guys she has been with, but that is what she was comfortable with.

It had been a week since "the incident" (the kiss). Marissa was going on her 3rd "date" with Ash, which meant this was probably the night they were going to fuck for the first time. She wasn't too nervous; sex was something she was actually good at. She didn't have too many high hopes for sex with Ash, considering his four-play and kissing skills left a lot to be desired. In one instance, when they were making out and his weirdly soft lips were attacking hers, she flashed back to "the incident." The way Ash kissed was so delicate, so….boring. There was no real passion. She then remembered Ryan's hands, and his rough lips. That was a short-lived flashback because she quickly pushed them aside, not allowing herself to think of that when kissing Ash.

So tonight she was going to just go with it, not expecting anything too grand. Ash was taking her to this fancy restaurant, which was nice and safe. She was far away from Ryan and her thoughts of him. The dinner that her and Ash shared was predictable and lovely, and he even asked if she wanted to go for drinks after. She of course said yes, but when they got in the car he told her where they were going.

"Let's go to the Bait Shop"

Marissa froze in her seat. She knew the Bait Shop was the best place in town for drinks, but she also knew Ryan was most likely there. She really didn't want to run into him again for about another….like three years. This idea to go to the Bait Shop put a hitch in those plans.

"No. I mean, uh, it's kind of overrated" she lied

He laughed, "What? No way. That's the only good club and bar around here"

She didn't know what else to say, so she told the truth. Sort of

"My brothers best friend works there and I hate him. Like really really hate him"

Ash laughed a little, "The place is huge. We don't have to get our drinks from him then. Come on, let's just go for a drink or two and then we can go back to your place. You said your parents were out for the night right?"

She nodded and didn't say anything. She knew if she continued to argue it'd look weird. Because in truth, the Bait Shop was huge and the fact that she wasn't going because of one person seemed ludicrous. Still, she didn't want to see him at all. Not even a glimpse. She had done so well to rid her mind of him.

"So when do you get off work?"

"2. You think you can wait till then?"

"For you? I think so"

Ryan smirked at the girl he had been hitting on all night at the bar. She was perfectly drunk and perfectly hot. He needed a good lay so badly, and now couldn't wait until 2 a.m.

"See you at 2" She winked and went back to her friends.

Ryan flung his rag over his shoulder before serving some other people. It was a pretty busy night, and he knew the tips were going to be awesome. His plan to get an apartment within a couple weeks was getting to be an obtainable reality. He was making so much money bartending. Every night was super busy because of all the college students that were off for the summer. There were nights where he made $200. His account was now at $800, which was made in only 2 weeks. He felt things were finally coming together.

He then saw her. She was in this silver and black dress that hugged her nicely and showed off what little cleavage she had. He then saw the creature that was beside her, dressed in a light blue button up and khakis- typical white frat boy gear. He felt his muscles tense and anger build within him. He felt like jumping the bar and shoving the guy into the nearest wall. He was then brought out of his gaze when he heard a patron yelling for his attention to get a drink

He snapped himself out of it as he went to make a mint mojito. Who the fuck was that guy she was with? Another frat boy tool that she was banging? Slut. She was such a slut. She probably barely even knew the dude. And why did she bring him here? Did she want to shove him in his face? Why would she do that when he didn't give a shit?

He gave the woman the mojito before then seeing the dude standing there, waiting to be served. He blatantly ignored him before wiping the counter and then going to slice some lemons

"Hey, bro! Can I get a drink?" Ash asked

Ryan didn't look at him, "Don't bro me, bro"

"Well can you get me a drink?"

"I donno. I mean I CAN, but do I want to? I donno" Ryan said, finally looking at him and shrugging

Marissa wasn't lying. This guy was a giant dick. Marissa advised him to get drinks from the other end of the bar, where Dara was serving, but he just figured Marissa was being dramatic. What did this guy have against him?

"Hey, don't be a dick and get me a Light Bud"

"Light bud? How's your vagina?" Ryan asked with a laugh

"What the fuck is your problem, man?" Ash now raised his voice, not at all knowing what was happening right now. How the hell did this escalade so quickly, and more importantly, why?

"I don't have one. You however look like a doucheboy youth pastor and I only serve a certain clientele"

"What?" Ash yelled, "Get me the manager now"

Ryan looked around, pretending to look for the manager

"We have no manager" he lied

"Fuck off yes you do"

"Fuck off? I'd advice you to not speak to me like that"

"Fuck. Off. You white trash piece of shit"

Ryan's jaw clenched, and he grasped the rag in his hand. Normally he'd be pummeling this kid into the ground. But being at work and having recently been released from jail, he knew he shouldn't.

He stepped closer to the bar, gazing at this guy across the counter, people were now watching.

"What you gonna do about it pansy boy?" he asked, getting closer to him

Ash glared back at him, "Meet me outside and I'll show you"

Ryan knew this way too well. He had been in way too many fights to know this wouldn't end well for the other party. He wanted nothing more than to beat the shit out of this guy, but he was worried about what that could bring. He also knew he would be fired immediately if he was caught fighting outside his work.

"That unfortunately can't happen"

"Oh?" Ash smirked, "You scared?"

Ryan let out a large guffaw, amused at the mere fact of being scared of this guy.

"Of what? Of you? I could break you in half, you fuck"

At that moment Marissa appeared by Ash's side, seeing the commotion from far away

"What the hell is going on here?" she asked, looking between Ash and Ryan

Ryan looked at her and they locked eyes for a second, before quickly looking away. They hadn't seen each other in a week, and it was way too soon for them to be looking at each other head on.

"This guy is a fucking dick. He wouldn't serve me"

Marissa rolled her eyes, "Really? Are we that immature?"

"I'm not the loser who asked to meet up for a fight outside like a fucking middle schooler"

Marissa then looked to Ash, "You were going to fight?!"

Ash pointed at Ryan, "This guy needs an ass kicking" he said and looked to Ryan, "Which, by the way, is still going to happen. As soon as you're off work pal-"

"Don't call me pal, PAL"

"Oh yeah? Okay, pal. I'll meet you after work, pal. I'll bash your head in, pal" Ash threatened

"That a threat?"

"Stop!" Marissa begged them both

Ash was now the one to lean over the bar

"You bet your ass it is"

Ryan smirked and went face to face to him, "You tryin show off for this bitch here?" he asked, insulting Marissa while he was at it.

"Fuck off, Ryan!" Marissa yelled

Thankfully Dara was so busy on the other side of the large bar, because she would have stopped this immediately and Ryan would probably be in big trouble.

"Yeah, fuck off Ryan"

"Seems like your overcompensating. Sorry man, she's gonna see your little baby dick eventually-"

That's when Ash punched Ryan, lunging over the bar. Ryan caught his fist the second time, pulling him over the bar completely, hitting some bottles, and delivering a punch to Ash, knocking him out.

That was when Dara rushed over, the crowd began to clamor, and security rushed over and pulled Ash up as he regained consciousness.

"What the fuck happened?!" Dara screamed

Marissa stood there, in complete shock at what just took place. She couldn't even speak it all happened so quickly. Before she could talk she heard the people around her explain that it was Ash who in fact, had attacked Ryan and Ryan had just countered it.

Ryan was expecting to be in major trouble. A barkeeper getting into a fight with a patron seemed fire worthy but after the situation being explained and backed up by so many people, it seemed that it was going to be all okay. Security was escorting Ash out, deeming him the instigator. Dara even asked if he wanted to press charges. Ryan! To press charges against someone else!

Marissa watched as Ash was being escorted out, his eye already bruising.

"Ryan, I'm going to serve these people really quickly and then we'll discuss this" Dara said before quickly going to serve the thirsty patrons who were all gossiping about what just took place

"What the fuck is wrong with you!" Marissa finally yelled at Ryan

"Excuse me?" Ryan turned and asked

"You! You! Fuck you! This is so- this is so-" She was so angry she was out of words. She ran her hand through her hair, "This is all your fault and you know it!"

Ryan glared at her; thankful Dara quickly was rushing back to work and not within hearing range.

"Consider it an unintentional favor, guy was a total tool shed"

"Favor? That's what you're going with?"

"Unintentional favor, yeah"

She was furious. This whole entire fight was completely Ryan's fault for instigating it.

"You are so pathetic" she spat before pushing passed everyone to go out to see Ash

Ryan rolled his eyes as he watched her walk away. He then bent down to take a piece of ice to put to his eye. Sucker punches were so lame. You never hit a guy when he isn't ready, that's just a cheap shot. What the hell did Marissa see in that guy? He seemed to have the personality of a plastic bag and he was just so….vanilla.

"Atwood" he then heard and he saw Dara walking up to him

He sighed, bracing himself for a lecture.

"So we don't look fondly at all on fights between patrons and workers. Considering that guy hit you first, I understand it was a defense move but when that happens, you call security. Don't get involved. And I know he didn't hit you out of the blue, I know you too well. What I'm saying is, this happens again and we'll have a more serious talk. That said, take the rest of the night off, your eye is swelling"

"I'm fine. I've had much worse"

"I'm sure. But I also kind of need you out of here to diffuse all of this crap about the bartender beating up the customer. So take a breather and come back tomorrow, I'll have Roscoe come out of the office and cover"

Ryan sighed, knowing this wasn't good. He couldn't let this happen again. This could have cost him his job. He wiped the counter, grabbed his cigarettes, and left the club.

He lit the cigarette as soon as he got outside, leaning against the building away from the front entrance.

"ATWOOD!"

He heard an angry shriek and turned to see Marissa, charging at him. He braced himself before she walked over and pushed him harder into the wall

"What the fuck" he asked

"Your stupid fucking shit back there has Ash all pissed at me!"

"Why you?"

"Cause I didn't stick up for him"

Ryan laughed before taking a drag of his cigarette, to which she then grabbed it out of his mouth and threw it

"Hey! Those are expensive!" he yelled at her

"Good! Why do you have to ruin everything! Every single thing you seem to make shittier! Just because your life is shit doesn't mean you have to make other people's shit too!"

"My life is no less shitty than yours! You are just living in a little bubble, and when that bubble bursts you'll realize you're a miserable bitch, just like the rest of the Newpsie scum"

"Oh please, enough with all the Newpsie bullshit! I'd much rather live in a bubble than the shithole you call home. Oh wait; you don't even HAVE a home! You live in a fucking motel!"

He was furious now, and he could see people were staring from outside the club. He knew things would only escalate if he stayed, so he quickly plucked out another cigarette and walked away from Marissa, down the boardwalk.

He was anger marching and then he heard the little clicks of heels racing behind him. He hadn't made it more than 20 feet before he felt an arm grab his arm before she ripped it back so she was in front of him.

"That's it?! You aren't even going to come back at me?"

His jaw was clenching, a sign that he was about to lose it. He looked back, the club now a safe distance away. He looked to Marissa and took a drag of his cigarette, not saying a word.

She crossed her arms and looked at him, wondering why he wasn't sniping back. His silence only made her angrier

"Oh so now you don't talk huh? You're suddenly Mr stoic? So you randomly bitch out the guy I am seeing, cause him to fight you, then me tell you off, and now you have NOTHING to say? Nothing at all?"

He glared at her, finding his silence making her crazy. So he continued to just take a drag of his cigarette

She huffed and slammed her foot down, "What is your problem? Why were you so mean to him? Tell me! Tell me why you are such a miserable jerk! I am seriously trying so hard to understand how someone could be such a terrible excuse for a person! Tell me!"

He had enough of the silence game. He couldn't hold it back

"Because that guy was a pitiful excuse for a dude! He is the exact reason I hated this town and everyone in it. He is a full of himself shithead just like you!"

"You don't even know him! All you did was deny him a fucking drink! Do you hear yourself? Do you know how psychotic you sound! God, you shouldn't have been in prison! You should have been in a psych ward!"

"Shut the fuck up! You don't know shit about why or what happened to get me there!"

"I know you're an idiot who can't control his temper! You're a fucking animal!"

"You don't know ANYTHING! So I'd suggest you shut up right now!"

"Or what?" she shrieked

"OR!" he yelled, huffing and puffing and then grabbed her face with his one hand and pulled her to him, attacking her mouth with his. He knew this would happen eventually, that he wouldn't be able to control himself. This is the exact reason he didn't want to see her, because despite his anger and hatred at the moment, he wanted her.

She was breathing heavily from her anger, but once she was pulled in she attacked him back, not even thinking, too enticed by his passion.

He immediately dropped his cigarette and allowed his hand to go down her back, groping her ass as his other hand tangled in her hair.

She felt herself giving in to everything he was doing, but then she remembered where they were. They were on the boardwalk. In public. Where people she may know were around. She pulled back and jumped away from him

"What are you doing?" she yelled, pretending to be disgusted

He looked around, realizing they were on the boardwalk, and if anyone he knew saw him do that, he'd be fucked. He saw the looks of other people smirking at them due to their blatant display of affection.

He looked back at her, her arms still crossed, her face now flushed.

"I donno" he said honestly. He really didn't, either. He didn't understand why he felt this compelling need to touch her and grab her. It was like this uncontrollable urge that he really didn't understand. He got that he found her attractive, but he hated her so much that he really thought that should trump everything else.

She licked her lips, tasting him still on her and her face grew hotter. She ran her one hand through her hair, nervous. She continued to look around, making sure she saw no one she knew that could have saw that display. Thankfully she saw no one, and the people that saw before had moved on.

"Don't ever do that again. You….you are disgusting. I'd rather kiss a monkey than you. Actually, there really is no difference. Your habits imitate that of a fuckin chimp" she spat, now just wanting to go back to fighting. That was her comfort zone with him.

"Yeah well I only did that to shut you the fuck up. You don't know when to shut your mouth," he defended himself.

"Yeah, okay. That's why you have kissed me twice now. Tell yourself whatever you want to sleep at night"

"Hey, you have been into it"

"Oh, gross!"

"Stop lying to yourself. You wanna fuck me just as badly as I wanna fuck you" he fought. He then froze

Her mouth opened a bit in shock, not actually hearing his admission before of wanting her. I mean, two seconds ago he was still making excuses for his behavior. Now there it was in the open.

"So you do wanna fuck me?" she asked

Ryan knew what he had done, and knew he'd now just have to commit. He couldn't go back now, that'd be weak. He just had to be blunt, like he was used to being. He took out another cigarette and lit it

"Yeah but don't flatter yourself," he said and took a drag. He saw her face was still flushed, a sign she was either flustered, aroused, or maybe both. He wanted to explore this, because at this point his want only grew more.

"Yeah well I'm with Ash, so" she started and then realized what she was saying, "And even if I wasn't there would be no way in absolute hell that I would ever consider letting you do anything to me. I would not stoop that low"

He glared a bit, and took a long hard drag before stepping closer to her, her body tensing at the gesture.

"I think we both know that sex with that kid would be as vanilla as it could get. I, however, know a thing or two" he said, his voice husky. "I can make you cum so hard you'd swear you might pass out"

She stood still, so shocked she didn't really know how to react at all. She was so taken aback that she was speechless for once. However, she felt herself slightly throb at the sound of his voice, and his take-charge attitude. She swallowed thickly and looked him in the eye to see them dark again.

He saw he got to her a little and he bit his lip to stop from smirking. God he hated her, but also how he wanted her. He leaned in and put his lips to her ear

"45 Monte Ave" he whispered with his low husky voice again, before looking at her still flushed face and walked away, back to fetch a cab, and back to his motel on 45 Monte ave.

She still stood there, transfixed on the spot before her that he had just left. She let out a slightly incredulous laugh. 'There is no way' she thought to herself, before letting her smile fade, and thinking about him; the way he smelled, the way he kissed, his hands, and the words he spoke to her. She felt her body reacting and her heart racing, and before she knew it, she went to fetch a cab herself, trying not to overthink it.

Ryan was at his motel, freshening up with a new tee shirt. He seriously didn't know if she would take his offer, but he hoped so hard that she would. He was so ridiculously turned on at the thought alone. He looked in the mirror at himself. He saw his black eye from before and gripped the counter. What was he doing? This was Marissa Cooper? His best friend's little sister who he wanted to throttle at times.

He then heard a knock on his door and he whipped his head to look at it. He ran his hand over his face and then felt a smirk appear. This was it.

He walked over to the door and opened it to see her. She was breathing heavily and looked hesitant but eager. He stepped back to allow her to enter the room. She looked at him quickly before walking passed him into the dimly-lit motel room.

He closed the door and turned to see her facing him.

"This isn't because I like you. I want to establish that. I still hate you. I still think you are a low life. I still think you are the epitome of tr-"

She was cut off by his lips and without hesitating she threw her clutch aside and wrapped her arms around his neck. He immediately pried open her mouth with his tongue and attacked it with his. His hands immediately drifted back to her ass and squeezed it before pushing it so she was against his groin.

She gasped, feeling his hardened member against her. She found herself already wet with anticipation. He used both hands to pick her up by her ass and push her into the wall, pushing himself harder into her and grinding himself into her thigh.

She accidentally let a moan slip, because despite her being here and obviously liking his advances, she didn't want him to know just how much she was enjoying him. But it was pretty much impossible not to make a sound.

He loved the taste of her lips, constantly sucked and nipping at them, his hand on the back of her head now so that he could attack her mouth as much as possible. He quickly reached to her back and unzipped her fancy cropped top that he wanted off immediately. He was eager to see what she looked like naked, after now fantasizing about it so thoroughly.

He threw her top aside and looked to see she was bra-less, her nipples perked in arousal. He felt his pants tighten to their furthest extent. She was heaving heavily, her face red with anticipation, before he let his mouth go downwards to work on her chest.

She moaned deeply now, her hands grasping his sandy blonde hair. He worked her chest with his hands and his mouth until she reached down and tugged on his shirt, obviously wanting it off and to move forward.

He quickly stood up and lifted his shirt over his head, flinging the shirt aside before reconnecting their lips, shoving her aggressive-like into the wall again.

She moaned at the roughness, before letting her hands feel his abs. She had to admit, his body was really hot. Like, really really hot. His arms were so strong and his abs were taut but not like an Abercrombie-model's. They were just manly. Everything about him was manly. She needed to feel him, not wanting to wait. She reached down and grasped him through his jeans, a small gruff noise escaping his lips.

He felt huge, and she moaned at the thought. He quickly unzipped her skirt, throwing it aside, before unzipping his jeans and throwing them as well. His lips went to her neck, sucking on it as his hands reached downwards to her panties, as he grasped his whole hand over her just to feel her. She let out a high-pitched moan and was now panting. He hadn't even put his hands in her panties and she was already trembling.

He pushed her panties aside and rubbed his fingers against her, causing her to moan loudly and grasp his shoulders, digging her nails into him.

He felt just how wet she was and he bit her collarbone, so turned on. He kept rubbing his knuckles against her, as her moans increased and her panting heightened. He didn't want her to cum just yet so he stopped and pulling down her panties, her hands immediately going to his dick.

He reached down and pulled himself out of his boxer briefs and she gasped as his size. He took her hand and pulled it off him before slamming both her arms over her head.

She loved him taking control and she immediately lifted her leg to wrap itself around him, gasping and moaning as she felt him against her.

He held her arms still over her, as they ferociously made out, his dick teasing her until she couldn't take it

"Fuck me" she begged

He quickly reached down and positioned himself, sliding himself into her half way then slamming the rest of himself into her. She screamed loudly, never having anyone that big inside her. It hurt a little, but the pleasure was greater so she whimpered and then moaned.

He lifted her legs so he could hold her up against the wall, and increased the pace of his thrusts. They didn't kiss anymore. This was no longer foreplay. This was pure rough sex and they were applying the no-kiss no-intimacy rule.

Her moans increased, turning into soft screams, as he reached one hand down to rub her as he fucked her. This turned her on so much that she felt herself already about to climax. She felt the familiar hot sensation and her muscles start to tighten around him. He rubbed her harder and took longer thrusts. Her nails were now devouring his back in pleasure and she screamed as she came violently around him. She could barely see she was so dizzy so she closed her eyes and rested her head against his shoulder as he still thrusted inside her, until he groaned out loudly as he came too.

They were both breathing heavily, trying hard to catch their breath. He was still inside her, holding her against the wall as she tried to recover. A couple minutes passed and she lifted her head off his shoulder, hearing the sound of their skin separating because of their sweat. They were like glue being pulled apart as they stepped away from each other, Marissa's legs still trembling.

They looked at each other, not believing what just happened. He found his eyes scanning her body, amazed at how hot she looked and how he had just fucked that. She stared back, admiring his body. They then realized just how vulnerable they were and quickly went to throw their clothes back on in silence.

After she zipped her cropped top and turned to see him pulling his shirt back on, she finally spoke.

"This can never happen again. And this can never be told to anyone"

He nodded, "I agree about the not telling anyone"

"And it can't happen again"

"We'll see" he said as he licked his lips, they were so dry now. He still hated her, but he couldn't deny that that was some of the best sex he had ever had. He didn't want to say completely that it would never happen again.

She stared at him, opened her mouth to say something, and then closed it. She didn't want to argue it. That was the best sex she had ever had, even though she'd never ever admit that.

She didn't say another word as she grabbed her clutch, and left the motel. She walked to the street and hailed a cab. As she sat down she leaned her head against the seat in disbelief about what had just taken place.

"What have I done?"

He stared at the door that she had just left from. He couldn't believe he had sex with Marissa Cooper. If Kyle ever found out, that would be the end of him.

"What the fuck did I just do?"


	6. Again

**This chapter is VERY M. REVIEWWWWW!**

The next day Marissa awoke with a feeling of anxiety, confusion, anger, humiliation, and some excitement. What had she allowed herself to do? Why did she do that? She showered, as if she was cleansing herself of the act, but then came the images. The images of his touch, and his lips, and his….she stopped herself, feeling herself reacting. She looked down as she continued to wash herself and saw a bite mark on her collarbone from him and her hips were bruised from him gripping her so tightly. She gasped, knowing she had to cover those up immediately with coverup. No one could see this. Great, now she had a fucking reminder of her fuckup. She quickly turned off the water and stepped out, needing to get out of the house and distract herself.

What was worse is that she couldn't tell anyone about this, not even Summer her best friend. She was far too embarrassed and she didn't want to let her hatred of Ryan be questioned. She did still hate him. Just because she had some of the most mind blowing sex with him didn't make her hatred die. If anything it made her hate him more; hating him for how amazing it was and what he managed to do to her that no guy had managed before. It would be easier if he was awful at it, and then she could deflate his ego and use it against him.

As she walked to her bed she saw she had a text from Ash. She bit her lip and picked up her phone, "Hey, sorry about last night. I'll make it up to you when I get back from Palm Springs on Sunday :)"

She sighed and threw her phone on her bed. Fuck. Ash. As if it wasn't horrible enough that she slept with Ryan, she also betrayed the guy she was pretty much together with. She really fucked up.

Ryan woke up with slightly less muddled emotions. Sure he was confused, he just slept with a woman who made his blood pressure rise in anger every time she was near. The anger stemmed from him allowing himself to do that with a girl he didn't respect mentally, and a girl who was his best friends sister. Mostly, the latter. This was against guy code, to do this to a friend. It would be one thing to have pure intentions with her, but his feelings towards her were anything but. He should have had more restraint and thought with his head instead of his dick.

Then there was the excitement. Every time he thought about what happened his pants tightened to the point where he had to take a shower and take care of the situation. He had a lot of sex in his life, but that was definitely up there with the best. Man, if she weren't so sexy this whole situation would go away. But she was sexy, so now his plan was to just avoid her until this brushed over.

* * *

He rode to work on his piece of shit bicycle, reminding himself that he really needed some wheels, and entered work to some great news. He was being promoted to a key holder of sorts. He had the ability to open and close the shop and prepare and set up for the day. Oh, and there was a pay increase. This had the ability to change everything. He could finally put down a deposit for an apartment soon, and get a vehicle. He was so fucking happy, and it helped dispose of the Marissa thoughts for a bit.

Work went by quickly with his excitement from the promotion, and the lunch rush bringing in lots of money. He was on break before the evening shift and went outside for a cigarette when his phone rang. He saw it was Kyle and he felt his stomach drop a little remembering what he had done. He pinched the bridge of his nose and sighed, before picking up.

"Hey man"

"Hey! I got your text dude that's incredible! We got to celebrate. When are you off in the evenings?"

Ryan felt even guiltier. Kyle was such a killer friend and he goes and fucks his little sister. And wouldn't mind fucking her again.

"Uh, I'm actually off tomorrow"

"Great, lets go to McDoulan's with Mike and Jake"

Ryan was scared to see Kyle. He knew once he some him the guilt would worsen. Kyle was the only person he told everything too. Ryan wasn't much of a venting guy but Kyle was the one to go to whenever something happened. Keeping this from him felt weird, and what's worse is that the guilt didn't stop him from wanting to fuck his sister over and over. What was wrong with him? Was he really that fucked up?

"Yeah man sounds good. I got soccer practice with my club and then we'll go out," he said

"Sweet man. Congrats again, beers on me tomorrow"

Ryan bit his lip and rubbed his hand over his face, "Yeah thanks, man. See you then"

He hung up and sighed heavily.

"God damnit"

* * *

Marissa's conscience wasn't any clearer. She was poolside at Summer's with cocktails and some friends and all she kept thinking about was her secret. She made sure to have a coverup on, to cover her bruises, even though she had put concealer on them as well. It weirdly excited her to have this thing that was sort of off limits and that only she knew. Then on the other hand she hated the secrecy and not being able to tell anyone. So instead, she just drank her gin martinis until her thoughts were fuzzy and she wasn't analyzing them so much.

So this is what it came to, drinking to forget. Not that she hadn't used alcohol to clear things up for her before, but she hated that she was doing it to forget Ryan Atwood. But if that's how it had to before a few days, that's how it had to be. She continued to pound down the drinks until she no longer thought about anything rational, nor cared anyway.

* * *

Ryan went into work the following day for the lunch shift. The day after "the event" (the sex) was rough, but today was a new day. A day where he didn't masturbate in the morning to the thought. Mostly because he was running late for work, but still, it was a victory. He had work, soccer practice, and then drinks with the boys. Today was a giant distraction, which he desperately needed.

He arrived at work to Dara running up to him

"Hey we are kind of in crisis mode here," Dara said with a frenzied look, "Roscoe has come down with the flu and we have this huge Newport fundraising thing tomorrow that we are supposed to bartend. The only other person assigned there is Jesse and god knows he needs help. So you have to go to manage it okay? Consider this your first mini manager task"

Ryan now groaned. Newport events. Newport events were like everything Ryan hated materialized into one room. All the pompous attitudes because they donated to a country they would never enter, nor know about, but feel like they are the best for doing so. All the arrogance and cocktails and dresses made his head spin.

"Don't give me shit after I just promoted you. You should be thanking me for this gig as well. Do you know how much drunken Newpsies pay at these things? You are looking at some serious money"

He liked the sound of money. "Yeah but is it worth the headache?"

"Yes. Also because you should still be kissing my ass right now for all that I am doing for you"

He sighed and ran his hand through his hair, knowing she was right. He owed her so much and didn't want to bitch, even if she was throwing him into the flaming pits of Newport hell.

"Okay, fine. I got you"

She nodded, "Okay. It's just you and Jesse but you are the headman so you are in charge. I know you can handle it, but don't fuck it up," she smiled

"Me? Fuck up? When would I ever?"

"Okay so the organizers will need your measurements for your uniform"

"uniform?

* * *

The following day Marissa was nursing a serious hangover. She felt sick to her stomach that she needed a distraction from Ryan still. The man who made her absolutely enraged, also made her need distractions from thinking about him in a less violent manner.

She laid in bed, watching Netflix all day and trying to get her mind off everything, which was near impossible. Why wasn't there a switch to just turn off your mind and all of the flooding thoughts? She just wished she went back to solely hating Ryan, and nothing more. She wished Ash was more exciting and was actually there to distract there instead of being in fucking Palm Springs. She wished she could confide in her best friend. She wished Ryan would hold her down and fuc-

She stopped her thoughts. She really needed that brain switch; because shit like that would keep entering her brain and then she'd feel herself growing warm. Her brain and her body seemed to continuously be working against her. Before she allowed herself to plunge into the sexual thoughts rabbit hole she got up to go get dinner.

She saw Kyle shoving down some Thai takeout. She picked up a container and a fork before starting to eat the pad thai.

"You look like shit," Kyle said as he ate

"Thanks dickhead" she murmured

He nodded before taking a sip of his coke; "You're going to the fundraising thing tomorrow right?"

She rolled her eyes. Her mom's best friend, Fiona Gladstone was the organizer for this dumb event so her mother was pressuring them into going. And by pressuring that meant threatening them. Her father, as per usual, was being reluctantly dragged along by the claws of their mother.

"I mean we have to or else mom cuts me off and kicks you out. She is a real treasure, that woman"

Kyle groaned, "I really hate these fuckin things"

Marissa shrugged, "At least they don't ID for drinks and its open bar"

"I'll bring some kush too. Got to be as fucked up as possible at these things"

"I'm game," She said and then ruffled her brothers hair before he smacked her hand off him. "Do you know whose going to be there?" she asked as she shoveled noodles in her mouth

"A bunch of horrible people"

She sighed. Her mother's friends were the worst. They were even more exaggerated versions of her mother, which wasn't speaking very highly. They used these charity functions solely as social gatherings, not the actual charity portion. But that is why alcohol was invented; for functions like these.

* * *

Ryan had went to practice, went back to the motel to shower, and was now grabbing a drink with the boys to celebrate his little promotion. Once he got there they started pounding drinks, all of his friends paying for them to congratulate him. When he saw Kyle his stomach plummeted for a second. His best friend not knowing made him feel horrible- like a giant cloud hung over him. And it didn't take long before the fundraiser event was brought up.

"So get this, I go into work today and our fuckin barkeep Roscoe has the flu so I gotta cover this dumb ass Newpsie event tomorrow"

Kyle turned to him, "Wait. Is it at The Grand?"

"Yeah, why?"

Kyle laughed, "Shit dude I am being dragged to that by my mom. Her stupid friend organized it"

Ryans face dropped. As if he wasn't dreading this evening enough, the Cooper's were now in attendence. He had so many thoughts and questions now racing. Julie and Jimmy Cooper were going to give him shit. Jimmy and Julie Cooper were going to make an ass out of him. Jimmy and Julie Cooper he hated. And then there was Marissa; Marissa whom he had planned to avoid until this crazy lustfulness disappeared. What would happen once he saw her again? He was working, so nothing could happen. He didn't want anything to happen, anyway. Right?

"You okay man? Did that news bum you out?" Kyle laughed a little

Mike chimed in, "Your parents are gonna give him shit dude"

"Nah they won't. They could get in trouble by the event organizers"

"The organizers are your parents friends," Mike defended Ryan. He knew Kyle's parents were pretty dickish, especially his mom.

Ryan finally spoke up, realizing his sudden silence was weird, "Fuck that dude. They say one thing and I can't promise what will happen"

"Man, don't start anything either. I know you can be an antagonist too. Do you know how much dough you can get with this gig? Keep your shit together and you are looking at a grand and up" Kyle said

Holy shit. A thousand dollars sounded so insanely good to Ryan. He needed that grand. With that grand he could put a down payment on an apartment finally. He needed that money, despite the complexity that the Cooper family will bring.

Jake, a friend of Ryan's from UCLA who played soccer with Ryan, and lived in the area, spoke up

"Damn dude don't let your hard-headedness blow $1,000"

Ryan rolled his eyes and gulped his whiskey, "I know. Just gotta fight my instincts to punch those people"

"Hey man I'll be at the bar a lot so we can chill. Also I am going to need you to just keep giving me drink after drink until I am obliderated"

"Sounds good man" he said before taking a gulp of his other glass of whiskey, "So uh, your sister gonna definitely be there?" he asked, as casually as possible. He needed to just make sure.

Kyle sighed, "Yeah, and try not to start shit with her either"

Ryan felt a weird tingling when he said yeah. He then felt so fucking guilty again, for his oblivity at the situation. "I'll try," he said simply before downing his drink. Tomorrow was going to be fucking interesting.

* * *

It was the day of the event, and Ryan was going to the Bait Shop to pick up some things. He borrowed Mike's car for transport for the thing, not wanting to carpool with Jesse, who was 19 and kind of an idiot; somewhat nice, but an idiot. He parked the car seeing Jesse waiting for him and they both got out.

"Hey boys, we got your suits here" Dara smirked, coming out from the shop and held out their dry cleaned suits that were provided by the organization for them.

Ryan groaned as soon as he saw it. It was a white shirt, black vest, black bow tie, and black pants and shoes.

"What the fuck? Just a vest? A FUCKIN BOW TIE? I'm gonna look like a fuckin Backstreet Boy"

"Backstreet boys were hot in their day, kid. I know a bowtie isn't your thing but this is what they gave us and this is what you're wearing. Jesse here's yours" she said and handed young Jesse the suit.

Ryan snatched the garment bag angrily out of her hand

"They wanna make us look like goons you know? To humiliate us"

"I think they just want you to look good, honey," she said

Ryan took the suits and him and Jesse changed before coming out and asking Dara to do their bow ties, both guys not knowing how. After she did she smiled at them, "Look at my boys all handsome" she smirked and adjusted Ryan's tie once more.

She saw Ryan's angry face and she smiled warmly, "You look great. Go make us some money" she said and tapped his butt before they grabbed the gear

"Ryan!" She then said and ran up to him, "Don't start anything tonight. I know how you can get and I really can't have the Bait Shop being dragged through the mud. I need you to really be on your best behavior, dude. Please. For me. Don't do anything dumb or say anything dumb. Fight the urges"

He rolled his eyes and sighed but nodded, "I know, I got it"

She nodded back and he walked off, getting into the car and driving off to The Grand. Once he arrived the gravity of the situation hit. Their barspace was huge, the room was huge, and he was in charge to serve 120+ people. He needed to step up his fucking game, and thoughts of the Cooper's were gone.

As he was setting up, the organizers approached him and he introduced himself, and he felt their judgment, as if they remembered him from 10 years ago. Already he felt himself about to blow, but he pulled himself back, focusing on setting up again.

* * *

Kyle had finished putting on his tux and was getting into the limo his mother had got. He put the kush in his inner pocket of the suit and got into the limo, next to his sister, who was in a long sheath red dress with red lace from the waist up. His mom was dressed way too young for her age, yet again, in a super tight, low-cut black dress.

He knew he had to tell them Ryan was the main bartender, having held it off long enough, knowing it would cause problems.

"So just a little heads up, the Bait Shop has leant the bartenders for tonight and Ryan happens to be that head bartender"

"WHAT!" Julie and Marissa screamed simultaneously

"You are just telling us this now?" Julie shrieked

"Well, yeah. Because I was holding off this whole thing" he gestured to their overreactions

"Oh I don't believe it! Fiona would never hire such trash!" Julie screamed before pulling out her phone

"Mom what are you doing!" Kyle reached over and grabbed her phone, "You are insane! The other guy got sick so Ryan's filling in! He's a fuckin manager he'll do his job"

Marissa sat there, in shock. She hadn't expected to see him so soon. She had done so well keeping her mind out of the gutter. I mean, sometimes thoughts crept up, but she would immediately distract herself and get them out. She had not mentally prepared herself for tonight and him being there.

"I swear to god if he makes ONE remark-" Julie threatened

"He won't, calm down. Dad talk some sense into her"

Jimmy, who wasn't a fan of Ryan's either but wasn't as loud about it, looked at Julie tiredly, "Just take drinks from him and walk away. That is it"

"Well he won't be getting tips from me. He isn't worth it"

"Classy mom. Charity brings out a nice side of you," Kyle sniped

Marissa still kept quiet, trying to come to terms with the fact that she'd see him. Why the fuck did he have to be there? It was as if wanted to piss her off and took the shift to do so. What a dickhead. And why was she allowing herself to fret his appearance? He was so not worth it! She was determined to just remain hating him, and hating him only. Nothing else.

They arrived at The Grand, a beautiful place that held large functions. They all got out of the car, Jimmy tipped the driver, and they started into the place. Marissa stopped for a second.

"I'll meet you inside" she said

Julie looked confused, "Why?"

"Why do I need to tell you?" She sniped. "I just saw my friend so I am going to say hi before I come in" she then lied

"Oh, Heather?" Julie asked, smiling as she saw Heather Ferrow with her parents from far away

"Yupp," Marissa lied. She hated Heather.

Julie believed her and they all went inside, Kyle going straight to the bar where Ryan was to get drinks.

Once they were gone, Marissa reached into her black clutch and pulled out her pack of cigarettes that she stashed. When she drank or was stressed she liked to have some on hand, and right now she was a bit stressed and preemptively smoking before the drinks set in.

She took large drags to settle the thoughts that were racing, thoughts she didn't think she had to deal with for a while because she hadn't expected to see him. As if this night wasn't going to suck enough. She hated how she was now so anxious. Why was she letting this happen to her over him? It was just Ryan, who was a succubus. Yes, it could be awkward, but she shouldn't let herself get so worked up. He was so below worth it. After her little inward talk with herself, deciding that she wouldn't let this affect her, she flicked her cigarette, straightened up, and walked inside.

Ryan was already serving up drinks, particularly to Kyle, who had taken 2 shots of whiskey already. He was moving pretty quickly, and managed to serve all the people waiting before he had a lull. He was wiping the bar and then looked up to see her. Her dress hugged her, and the laced top teased her skin underneath. She looked incredible. Beyond sexy. She looked like a god damn model. He licked his lips, feeling them dry, before he snapped out of it hearing someone ask for a whiskey sour. He cleared his throat and then made the drink.

He told himself he wouldn't think about her. He had done so well the past two days with pushing those thoughts out, he wasn't going to mess up now. Besides, she wasn't worth his interest. This girl was not worthy of his want. She was worthy of anger, and that was it. He had to keep telling himself what a terrible person she was, but then his dick had other ideas.

"Hey man, 2 more shots of whiskey, then I'm gonna go smoke some kush and try to find a girl," Kyle slapped the counter before downing his two shots Ryan served him and finding a spot out back to go smoke.

Marissa spotted him. When did the whole waiter attire look so sexy? Ugh, gross, she then said to herself. It was an instinct reaction to respond, even inwardly, with words of disgust when thoughts of Ryan being attractive entered. His low-life self, she always told herself, made him so unattractive and grimey. Yet, she knew deep down the fact of the matter was he was hot. She also saw him naked and she wasn't blind; the guy was fuckable. Even through his bartending attire, she saw his bulging biceps, and his taut pecs.

'yuck, stop. This is so disgusting just stop looking at him. But you need drinks. Like, really really need drinks. And all these people are annoying. How do I get drinks without seeing him? No. No. You aren't getting all weird like this. You won't let yourself, remember?'

Her inner dialogue once again made her straighten up and approach the bar. She knew she'd have to deal with him at some point so she didn't go to Jesse for the drink. She placed her hands on the bar and tapped her fingers and he looked up at her.

She was even better looking up close. And he could now see the skin that was teasing under the lace, and could see the curve of her boobs and then looked back up to her face to see her lips. Her lips, which felt so fucking good, and-

"So this is your gig? Being our bitch for the night?" she remarked. She figured it'd be easy to go back to enemies only, because the way he was looking at her was getting her a bit hot, and she needed to nip that in the bud.

And then she spoke. He was brought back to reality.

"Probably not the best idea to talk smack to the bartender. You're underage remember?"

"Not in two weeks I'm not"

"Two weeks isn't today. So I guess it's water for you little girl" he started to get her a water

"Wait! Ugh!" She groaned and rolled her eyes before ripping out a 20 from her purse and slapping it on the counter. "Dry martini"

"Hmmm, I donno. I feel it's pretty cheap to buy me out. You aren't exactly worth it" he glared at her

"This is your job. I know the organizer. It'd probably be wise of you to pour because I can make this all go away"

"That a threat?"

"What does it sound like? It's a powerful threat too"

He clenched his jaw, wanting to say something horrible to her but he then thought of Dara's words. He needed to hold back tonight, nothing stupid. This was an important event for the Bait Shop and Dara had given him so much.

So, he poured her fucking martini and placed it in front of her. Before she could take the 20 back he snatched it and placed it under the bar where the other tips resided. She glared at him and he glared back, their eyes locked in anger.

She now noticed his face, those rough lips, and that little dimple in his chin and those eyes. His eyes were starting to get that hungry look and Marissa broke out of the gaze. She didn't want to see that. Keep it angry. She took her drink and downed it, then ordered another.

"I shouldn't over serve, lightweight," he said snidely

"Fuck off and pour"

He flicked her off subtly and began to make her drink. He looked at her a little as he made it, knowing their glaring match before evoked something inside of her, and he liked that. She wasn't making eye contact at all now, purposefully looking around so she wouldn't catch his eyes.

He placed the martini on the counter; she grabbed it without looking at him, and walked away. She needed to avoid that bar, have Kyle get her drinks from now on.

Ryan went back to work, not having time to mull that moment of theirs over. People were crowding the bar and he had to power work, having to help Jesse as well who sometimes didn't know how to make things.

The tip pile under the bar was growing and Ryan couldn't be happier. Then Jimmy and Julie were at the bar.

"Gin and tonic and a 7 and 7" she said with pursed lips, her eyes wincing as she looked at this despicable boy.

He clenched his jaw, glaring back, not intimidated in the least. He made their drinks, pouring them weaker for them and slamming them on the bar.

She jumped a bit and scoffed, "God, still no class I see"

"Right back at ya. Now will you please step aside, I have other people to serve" he said through clenched teeth.

Jimmy grabbed his wife's elbow and pulled her away before she snapped at him.

Ryan glared as they left. Those two. God, how he hated them. He quickly snapped out of it when someone yelled their order again. Thank god the bar was busy, or else he'd have time to think about too much shit.

Finally, an hour into the event it died down a little. He looked under the bar and smirked at Jesse, estimating they had at least $500 so far. Man these people were spineless worms but they could still throw out money if you give them booze.

He then saw Kyle again, who was blazed as fuck. "How ya feelin, man?" Ryan asked smirking

"High as a mutha fucka but parched. 2 shots of whiskey porfavor, as well as a vodka cranberry and a dry martini"

He poured the two shots, which Kyle downed quickly and then made the two other drinks.

"You find two ladies?" Ryan asked, due to the drink orders

"Yupp. One being my sister. The other being the girl I found to fuck tonight"

"You doin your sis's dirty work with the drinks?"

"She doesn't wanna see you bro. And I am assuming vice-versa. Although this is the only time I am doing it. I am getting pretttttttty fuckkkkkked upppppp," he groaned

Ryan laughed and placed another whiskey shot in front of him, which he of course downed. Kyle then tried to place a $20 on the counter and Ryan pushed it back.

"Not taking your money"

"Come on man, just-"

"Not going to happen. Seriously. Take your money," he said and Kyle rolled his eyes and put it back in his wallet, before taking the two drinks.

"See ya later, dude, hopefully with a chick on my arm"

Ryan laughed again, "Later man"

He watched Kyle go back to the table he was at, where the girl he assumed he was talking about sat, and Marissa with another young guy. A guy who was so obviously flirting with her you could see it from the bar. What a slut. She has a boyfriend too. Not that he should judge because, well…but still.

"Hey man, need your help here," Jesse said as more people approached the bar.

Ryan threw down his rag, tearing his eyes away from the whore and serving the people.

In only took another hour before she approached the bar again. She saw Jesse was busy so she rolled her eyes and approached Ryan.

"Dry martini and a vodka soda"

He looked at her and threw his rag over his shoulder, a move she found weirdly attractive in her drunken and high state.

"Vodka soda? Is that for Mr. giraffe neck over there" he pointed with his head to the guy she was at the table with. A guy with an unusually long neck, according to Ryan.

"Who?" she asked and saw whom he was referring to and rolled her eyes, "None of your fuckin business, barkeep"

Ryan smirked sarcastically, "Vodka soda? Really? How is his vagina?"

"Maybe he is confident in his masculinity and doesn't care, unlike some people who need to constantly remind people that he's a dude," she snapped

"I think we both know my masculinity is justified," he said huskily as he leaned on the bar

She was taken aback by his brashness. She felt her cheeks grow red, even redder than her blush from drinking.

"Don't flatter yourself," she finally spat out

He smirked, pleased with himself, "I'm not. You did that for me" he said before starting the drinks

She licked her lips and looked away, feeling really hot. The alcohol was not helping matters. She ran her hand over her loose strands of hair that were hanging down.

"Anyway, why does it fuckin bother you if that guy likes vodka? Jealous?"

Ryan let out a laugh as he shook her drink, "That's good. Jealous? Of giraffe? Or your boyfriend Fire"

"Ash" She said through clenched teeth

"Ah, yes" Ryan nodded, "he's only the mess made after a fire. The name Fire would be too cool for him"

"What the fuck is your deal? It has to be jealousy. You hate all the men I am at all involved with- and not involved with for that matter. God damnit you are infuriating. Get over it- I do not want you" she hissed softly, so no one else would hear

Ryan wiped the counter after finishing the two drinks and again leaned on it, leaning into her.

"I'm not jealous. I hate the men you are around because I genuinely hate all men around here. I think it's funny to fuck with you because you hate it. And lastly, you do want me. I know you want me. You wanted me the other night, and you want me now. I can tell, you're cheeks are getting redder as I speak and you're breathing all weird. You want me, cause unlike the scrooges you do surround yourself with I can fuck you like a real guy. And I now know what you like so I'd only fuck you better. So you can come flip out on me all you'd like, I hate you too, but I also know we both wanna fuck the living shit out of each other."

She stood there, her mouth slightly agape, her cheeks so red she was pretty sure she was on fire or would die of heat stroke. She still wasn't used to a guy talking to her like that; so confidently and matter-of-factly. She swallowed thickly, feeling herself throbbing slightly. She downed her martini in front of him, and then starting on giraffe neck's vodka soda before walking away, all the while Ryan smirking.

The night dragged on, and Marissa was still in a daze from before. She wasn't talking to anyone at this point, just pretending to listen. She kept glancing over at him, as he served people. Was he really not thinking about what happened? Or was he just pretending to act nonchalant?

She went out back to smoke the kush with Kyle again, needing as many fucking things in her as possible to push her lustful thoughts out. But it was so hard, all she kept thinking of was Ryan deep in her, his giant dick, and his body. She was pretty sure she had the female equivalent of blue balls and he hadn't even touched her. She walked back into the venue and saw it was 12:30am. She saw Ryan and Jesse packing up the drinks and putting everything back.

"Did we miss last call?" Marissa asked, stoned out of her mind

Kyle squinted over at the bar and walked over, "Hey man, you done?"

"Yeah man. Only were hired 8-12:30. I think this shit is done at 1"

"Nice. How much you make?"

Ryan looked around, knowing he shouldn't say the number out loud. "Dude me made 1,100 each," he said, trying to contain his excitement.

"Nice man!" Kyle said and slapped his hand, "I got you a good job gift since you wouldn't accept my money" he said and got close to Ryan and slipped a small joint into his hand. Ryan subtly slipped it into his pocket.

"Thanks man, totally need this right now. Gonna light it up out back" he said as he picked up the rest of the supplies he got from the bait shop, "See ya later man" he said and walked out to the back, loading Mike's car, and immediately lighting the joint.

He took a large drag and held it. He thought about Marissa and what he had said. He hoped it had stuck with her. He hoped she'd act on it at some point. He knew how horrible it was of him, to hit on her so severely with his best friend in the same goddamn room. But she looked so good, and he couldn't contain himself. It was near impossible at this point. He had a semi going on every time he thought about her tonight, thankfully all the Newpsies really killed his boner mood or there would have been a real situation.

Marissa saw Kyle give him the rest of the kush, and Ryan leave out back. Marissa through a haze looked around for 5 minutes, trying to figure out what to do. She bit her lip, knowing if she didn't act now Ryan would be gone and she'd be left high and dry the rest of the night. And she had to be fucked, like now.

She quickly got up and went over to Julie, "Hey mom my friend just got here to pick me up, I'm going to head out"

Her mom, who was in front of all her friends, couldn't fight back because it would look bad. So she put on a fake smile, "The event ends in, like, 20 minutes honey. You can't wait?"

"Mom, she is here. I can't have her wait" Marissa said, constructing sentences carefully, because she was super stoned and 3 martinis in.

"Fine" Julie said with a stiff smile.

Marissa gave a fake smile and walked back to Kyle, "See ya. Summer's here to pick me up, so"

"Ugh not fair, I should have done that. Can I come?" he begged, forgetting the girl he was trying to bang was sitting right there

Marissa quickly thought of something, "Uh, no. She is crying. About Seth. It'd be awkward if you were there"

"Ouch, nevermind. See ya"

Marissa smiled and grabbed her clutch before going to the bathrooms, and after looking around to see no one there, she slipped out the back. She saw him leaning against a car, finishing his joint. She bit her lip, and decided not to think but just go.

She marched down the steps and the clicking of her heels made Ryan look up.

He smirked as he exhaled. Holy shit, it was on. He watched her walk hurriedly, but still with this fucking sexy sway, towards him.

"Bout time" he said

"Shut the fuck up" she answered before approaching him and smashing her lips into his, grabbing his hair in fistfuls

He immediately flicked his roach aside and wrapped his arm around her, his other hand going immediately to her ass and squeezing it.

She immediately wrapped her tongue around his and moaned, the sexual tension having been so high, that it felt like itching a rash that had been itchy all night. He bit and sucked on her lips and then grabbed her tits through her dress.

He pulled back, "Get in the car"

"What?" she asked breathless

"Get in the fucking car" he ordered and she did as told. He quickly hopped in, got his keys out, and drove to a deserted spot on the side of The Grand, a place with no entrances or exits so they wouldn't be interrupted.

As soon as he stopped she immediately reached over and grabbed his dick. He stopped her

"Get out"

"What?"

"Get out" he ordered her again and she did as told.

He got out and lifted her up so she sat on the hood of the car.

"Unzip your dress," he said, not knowing how the fuck to do so.

She liked being ordered around, weirdly. His harsh tone made her bite her lip in anticipation. She unzipped her dress and stepped out of it, throwing it onto the hood of the car beside her. She looked at him and he looked so fucking hot, his vest opened, his white shirts top buttons unbuttoned, his hair messy.

He reconnected their lips, their kisses so frenzied it probably looked like they were eating one another. His hand went to the back of her bra and he flicked it open and threw it aside, immediately tweaking and massaging her nipples and boobs. She gasped at the sensation and opened her legs, urging him to touch her.

He then reached down and rubbed his hand over her clit and she whimpered. He reached inside them and grunted at how wet she really was. She was so wet. He bit her lip and then went to her collarbone, remembering how much she liked that. He bit and sucked on it and she leaned back, groaning "yes" as he stroked her.

He couldn't take it any longer and instead of slipping off her panties he reached down and ripped them off, causing the string to slap her a little and sting, and he threw them. She hissed at the pain but didn't care. He went to stroke her again but she stopped him, not wanting to cum now. She reached and unzipped his pants and quickly pulled down his boxer briefs and pants in one swoop, immediately grabbing his dick.

He looked at her and grabbed the back of her hair, grabbing her now sloppier bun, and tugging on it so her head was jolted back, and he leant down and kissed her hungrily before pulling back and looking at her.

"Suck me" he told her and she bit her lip, so turned on it was ridiculous. She immediately put her head down, licking his sensitive tip and hearing him hiss made her moan. She wrapped her lips around him, and started to suck him off. She couldn't get him all in her mouth, he was too big, so she worked the rest with her hands. He felt so good in her mouth that she was getting more turned on. He started to fuck her mouth, making her gag a bit but turning her on more. He quickly pulled out of her mouth, feeling close. He then unbuttoned his shirt and immediately took her legs and held them up as he slid into her with force.

She yelped, still not used to his size, but her natural lubrication really helped matters, and the pain quickly turned to pleasure.

He grunted at how good she felt. He was high too, and whenever he was high it just elevated his sensations. He was holding her legs up as he slammed himself into her, allowing himself to grind harder and harder, motivated by her constant groaning and moans.

"Yess" She kept saying over and over, unable to express further how she felt.

He lifted her ass up and spanked her, feeling like she'd like that, and she seemed too, so he did it again. She yelped and moaned and he pulled her upper body up to him so they were chest to chest. They never kissed, just like last time, they just fucked. She matched his thrusts and after about 5 minutes she felt herself climaxing. She let her fingernails claw his back, still feeling the scabs from last time.

She let out a guttural scream, her eyes starting to become blotchy black and she felt herself fully go, cumming around him so hard that she couldn't see properly, and let her head fall on his shoulder.

He thrusted a couple more times, long and slow, and came inside her, groaning deeply and squeezing her ass.

He felt how limp she was so he laid her onto the hood, collapsing on top of her.

Their breathing was so heavy it sounded like they just ran a full marathon, their bodies so slick with sweat that they looked like they just took a shower. After a couple minutes he peeled himself off her slick body and ran a hand over his face, not believing that they just fucked outside the place where her whole family was inside of. He then looked down at her naked body, her eyes fluttering open at him, and he believed it. She was so fucking hot.

She now looked bashful, immediately sitting up, holding her head because she became dizzy, and then mustering her strength to stand up, put on her bra, and slip her dress back on. She didn't know where her broken panties were so she forgot about them. She looked to Ryan who was buttoning up his shirt and tucking them back into his pants. She bit her lip and grabbed her phone out of her clutch that was thrown aside, and opened her uber app to connect to a taxi in the area to pick her up.

He looked at her after she put her phone back and pulled out a cigarette.

"Give me one," he said

Not strong enough for a snide response she threw him a cigarette before lighting hers. He had his own lighter and lit his.

They both stood there in silence for minutes, taking deep drags of their post-sex cigarettes. She didn't look at him, she was almost too embarrassed. She didn't like how vulnerable she acted when fucking him. How uninhibited he made her. How good he made her feel. She blushed even now just thinking about what just took place.

He looked at her, however. God, if she just didn't talk she'd be perfect. Sex with her was just so mind blowing it was surreal. It was just when she talked that he hated her. If she were mute, this would have happened a lot sooner.

"My ride is about to be here," she murmured as she looked at her phone, thanking god that she had that app to immediately get a car. It made this whole sex with no strings attached thing a lot easier.

"Ok" he said, not knowing what else to say, before he took another drag.

She finally turned to him, "I don't know why this happened again, ok? I don't like that I did this, just to let you know. I don't like you, just to let you know. I-"

"Marissa" he stopped her, "We don't like each other, we just like fucking each other. A lot. Like really a lot. Don't over analyze it," he said and she stood in silence, getting the buzz from her phone that her car was here.

"I have a boyfriend. Sort of" she reasoned

"Sort of" he then said and flicked his cigarette before getting out his keys. He then walked up to her, pushed her swollen lips into his and rolled his tongue over hers and grabbing her hair again. He pulled back to see her again shocked face, and he slapped her butt and smirked, licking his lips.

"Don't over think it," he said as he got into his car and drove away.

She stood in the pseudo alley that they just fucked in, stuck in place. What was happening to her? She may have a slight addiction to Ryan Atwood.


End file.
